Ask Mello! XD
by LeahKeehl13
Summary: Ask your question to the famous, sexy, second best, really sweet scar, leather wearing mafia boss! I'll answer anything!
1. Chapter 1

Ask Mello!

Ask your question to the famous, sexy, second best, really sweet scar, leather wearing mafia boss! I'll answer anything!

* * *

**A/N been seeing these everywhere so I decided 'what the heck' and did one meself. ;)**

**Disclaimer- if i owned deathnote then i would also own mello... *teehee* and wouldn't be writing about him...duh  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**First five responses! This was actually really fun to write! ...oh rite ;)  
**

* * *

mello yellow~

hai :3

okay, here's your questions.

1.) who's cuter, L or matt?

2.) whats your favorite brand of chocolate?

3.) what's your favorite color?

4.) what are your thoughts on unicorns?

and 5.) do you wear make-up or do your hair?

okay, thanks.

i loves you *hugs quickly before running off* dont shoot me please!

- anonymousXandrogynous:

**anonymousXandrogynous:**

**Hey!**

**obviously my Mattie is **_**much**_** cuter than L…. did u even have to ask?**

**My favorite chocolate is Ghirardelli chocolate…only the best for the second best… ****grrrrr….*randomly shoots person and feels muuuch better***

**My favorite color is black cuz im just that sexy and manly...although i do have a thing for red...especially hair. *smirks*  
**

**Opinion on unicorns? Pretty much the awesomest fucking thing ever….**

**and _WTF_? My **_**gorgeous**_** hair is just **_**naturally **_**sexy! Jesus! I don't straighten it…or gel it….or wash it twice a day…dammit… *****mumbles incoherently***

**~MELLO  
**

* * *

you eat so much chocolate (like ALL the time) ... so why dont you ever gain  
any weight?

-Cooookiiiiieeeeezz

**Cooookiiiiieeeeezz:**

**Well to answer your question; the reason is beacuse i am so awesomely bad-ass! Plus when you're running around, kidnapping people, beating the crap out of stuff and blowing shit up you burn a _damn_ lotta calories. ;)**

**~Mello  
**

**

* * *

**  
Alright, Mels...

What are you're thoughts on unicorns?

What was your first kiss like?

If I gave you enough chocolate, would you kill some people for me?

-11blackcat11

**11blackcat11:**

**first of all...my thoughts on unicorns...as i've said above...the'yre pretty fucking sweet...(why does everybody ask this question?)**

**next: Mattie is a _damn_ good kisser...thats all i'm gonna say about that one *smirks***

**and lastly (love that word): if you gave me enough chocolate i would do anything...just give me their name and address and i'll tell you the place to send the chocolate to ;)**

**~mello

* * *

**  
Hey mello i guess.

Can i have your gun?

Can i move in with you?

can i have a hug?

What's better - caramel chocolate or normal chocolate?

*pops out of no where and takes photo of us, to show to my friends. then  
kisses you on the scar cheek and dissapeers leaving my number lying on the  
floor*

-My Lipstick Tastes Like Jam

**My Lipstick Tastes Like Jam:**

**First of all: no you absolutly _may not_! i like my gun alot thank you very much. :0**

**about moving in with me; nope. I have a certain sexy redhead already living with me. XD  
**

**about hugs...yes. just one though...and fast...**

**-Mello  
**

***looks super creeped out at crazy fangirl running away with camera*  
**

* * *

Hey Mels!

What do you think of

AND

?

-mistyskiies

**mistyskiies:**

**1. Matt is my absolute best friend in the whole world...**

**2. and Near...i want to KILL that sonofabitch! grrrrrr *closes eyes, counts to 10 and breathes deep* :)**

**~Mello  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**a/n Here's another question! Keep em comin people! :D**

**disclaimer- dont own deathnote but wish i own Mello :0**

* * *

So i must ask you... how the hell could a chocolate-loving, girly-looking guy  
become the leader of the mafia?

Lovefornothing

**Lovefornothing:**

**I almost didn't answer this question btw...grrrrr. But I will forgive your naivete. Obviously you missed the memo beacuse this "girly looking guy" is probably the most badass dude since Chuck Norris. (feel free to insert random Chuck Norris joke here) And my hair is fucking sexy. So are my leather outfits! Plus I can use a gun. And might just use it on you if you piss me off anymore! :) **

**~Mello**


	4. Chapter 4

**a/n: haha more questions! these are sooooo much fun to respond to...lol**

**disclaimer:don't...own...deathnote**

**warning...LANGUAGE! if you have a problem with it please dont read this!  
**

* * *

Hi, Mello. You are my second favourite character!

1. Besides 'ow', how did you feel about getting your scar? Did you feel that  
it looked cool, or ugly?

2. Did you ever feel bad for killing most of the SPK, some Mafia people,  
making the POTUS kill himself, and then blowing up the Japanese police force,  
SWAT team, and remaining Mafia people? (And traumatizing Sayu Y.)

3. Which made you feel worse? Your scar, all of the stuff in #2, or indirectly  
letting Matt die?

4. Just to end this on a happy note, what are your thoughts on unicorns?

Kishimojin

**Kishimojin**:  
**1. about my scar...personally I think it looks pretty bad-ass...very good for intimidating people...but yes it was also the most fucking painful thing I have ever felt.. **

**2. Yes I feel bad for killing all of those people, the SPK and Japanese police force especially and the President not so much (fucking coward)...but I considered them all neccicary scrifices to stop Kira.**

**3. I feel the worst about Matt; he was my best friend and I let him die helping me. I think about him every day...**

**4. And as I think I have said before; unicorns are fucking amazing!**

**Thanks for saying i'm your second favorite character btw...**

**~Mello**

**

* * *

**Hey there, Mello, huge fan btw :D

So tell me what exactly would you do if you beat Near, you've dedicated all  
your life to that single goal, so what happens then...?

Oh and who tops in your realtionship with Matt? (I hope it's him XD )  
.spoon

**.spoon:**

**Haha thank you for that.. ;)**

**About beating Near:...I suppose I would take over for L...but I don't really know. I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it...because I WILL get to it!  
**

**And as for Mattie ever topping...not a chance in hell! ;)**

**~Mello

* * *

**tory: Ask Mello! XD  
Chapter: 3. Chapter 3

From: ( .net/u/2642636/ )  
Reply URL: .net/review_?reviewid=116356849

Hi there ^^

1: Do you have (or had) anyone that you really, really looked up to, or  
admired?

2: on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you hate Near?

3: What is your IQ?

4: What is your view on life?

You are awsome btw XD

-poisenousapples

**poisenousapples:**

**1. I have always admired L...he is the reason I work so hard and the one I strive so hard to be.**

**2. Probably a million...I hate that emotionless bastard. grrrrrr...  
**

**3. My IQ is a 161**

**4. Hmmmm good question...i supose mine is: work your ass off and kill everyone in your way to become number one; no matter what it takes...**

**and thaks for that btw, i am pretty awesome! ;D**

**~Mello**

**

* * *

**Did you know that NEAR IS AWESOMER THAN YOU! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

-NearLover

**NearLover:**

***screams wordlessly for several minuets straight* Well, did you know that I fucking hate your guts almost as much as I do that little emotionless albino sonofabitch? That little bastard always has to be better than me godfuckingdammit! AHGGGHHHHHH! *randomly shoots person and feels slightly better*... *sigh* And FYI dumbass: 'awesomer' is NOT a word and you should always end a question with a _question mark_. Plus I hate your penname. have a nice day...NOT!**

**Fuck you, **

**Mello**

A/N sorry sorry sorry NearLover!

* * *

**More reviews? :3**


	5. Chapter 5

**Yay! more questions!**

**language and I dont own Mello :'( oh and I also have nuthin against albinos fyi...just near =P  
**

**

* * *

**...Mello? Would you like to see some nice people with pretty white coats?

Jen: DON'T FALL FOR IT! WHAAA! *is gagged and dragged round out your sight*

Me: ...Or not? Maybe a calm dinner where Matt comes back alive and gives you a  
hug? Emphasis on CALM. Dude, you need to relax. More than I do! And that's bad  
dude. *gives f*** loads of chocolate* Come to the darkside. We. Have.  
Chocolate fridges of 120 Inches height and width.

Why do you hate Near so much anyways? AND DON'T SAY BECAUSE HE BEATS YOU. You  
could beat him at loads of things! Races, DDR (I love that thing...) or  
anything that requires exercise! Did you think about that?

joy2theworlddannyphantom

**joy2theworlddannyphantom:**

**Thanks for the chocolate. *hugs* And as for the questions about my sanity i am perfectly fine thankyouverymuch...just a little high strung. Being awesome can do that to you after all... A chocolate fridge sounds fucking awesome right now! as does dinner with Matt...i dont know about calm though...**

**About beating Near: I know I can beat him at some things; but beating Near at the 100 yrd dash (frickin easy he practically crawled) won't help me become L :(**

**And as for coming over to the dark side? Honey, I was born there.**

**~Mello

* * *

**Greetings, Mello...I am...Fuck...Never mind the formalities!

I FUCKING LOVE YOU, YOU SEXY SON OF A BITCH!

Don't worry, you can still stay with Matt.

ONTO THE QUESTIONS!

1) Here is one of my views on life: Life's a bitch and then you die. What do  
you think?

2) Is it true that...-Squeals- Sorry! My friend is begging me to ask you if  
you would video tape Matt, Near, and you having a threesome? PRETTY PLEASE!  
I'll give you all the chocolate in the world!

3) -Cough- Sorry...Fangirl moment. Anyway, what was it like having so many  
near (Pun intended) death experienced

Onto the unicorn question: Would you like to ride one with Matt into a  
rainbow-candy world full of love and sugary happy goodness where you are  
always number one?

(P.S - Sorry for my language.)

-Eva N loves you

**Eva N loves you:**

**HAHAHAHA thank you for that. ;D **

**Veiws on life: life's a bitch then ya die...couldn't have said it better my self!**

**2. Um..._ewww_...who wants to have a threesome with NEAR? damn little albino...Mattie on the other hand though...  
**

**3. My life is one hell of an adrenaline rush, i can tell you that much!**

**4. There must be at least one unicorn question. i'm starting to figure that out...but yes that would absolutly FUCKING ROCK! :D  
**

**~Mello

* * *

**

Mello :D

Your so awesome!

1. Is there another reason you hate Near besides being number one?

Eternally Yours,

Bee

**Bee: **

**I hate Near because unlike me he is able to be completely emotionless and practically dead all of the time...and that annoys the hell out of me...**

**~Mello**

* * *

Hi Mello! :D I love you and your Badass-ness! ... That word has now been  
created for you... _'

I just wanted to know...

1) What's Matt's most irritating habbit?

2) Galaxy or Cadburys? Or do you go for more "higher class" chocolate x3

3) And finally, how do you make your hair so flawless? ;)

Thank you~!

P.s, you and Matt and L are my fave characters! Heh, so you are better than  
Near in something! 3

P.s.s What are your thoughts on Unico- haha, Just kidding!

-ChocolateFTW

**ChocolateFTW:**

**Thanks for not finishing the unicorn question at least. ;D and now onto the questions...**

**1. Matts most irritating habit is definitely his ability to play Call of Duty for hours on end without speaking to me once... :'(  
**

**2. Galaxy XD**

**3. My hair is natrually flawless becasue I am natrually sexy. *smirks***

**Yessss! I beat near! HELLS YA! :D**

**~Mello**

**

* * *

Thanks for the questions peoples! Ya'll rock! **


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: hyuk hyuk hyuk...more answers! yay!**

**warning: don't own death note and probably swearing :)**

* * *

Do you know that you are a complete asshole?

And are dead?

And are totally obsessed with Near?

I mean, I get that you hate him, but honestly, is there a full chapter of  
Death Note in which you are included which you aren't talking about him or  
surpassing him or being number one or him in general?

At all?

Hm?

Did you know all I want for Christmas is...

you...

r bar of chocolate?

hahahaha.

never mind.

Final Question:

Ever participate in a car wash? Like a bikini car wash? I did that shit once  
and it was craaazy. If you haven't, don't! I get that you're one crazy  
gun-toting mothafucka, but there are things that you should just not do. Like  
ever.

Ever done anything that you'd advise someone never to do?

-TheLegendaryTurtles

**TheLegendaryTurtles:**

**I did know that I'm a complete asshole actually...you are only the last of many, many people to tell me that...and as for me being dead? Well I'm still in the denial stage on that one...**

**About Near: Obsessed is a strong word...I'm sure there's at least _one_ chapter where I don't mention him *seriously thinks for a while* dammit! I like to win! What in hell is the matter with that?  
**

**And I did do a car wash one time...I wore a black string bikini...seriously people! JUST KIDDING! That would be way weird...even for me... ;D**

**I have most definitely done something you should never do...never blow up a frickin building! jesus!**

**~Mello**

* * *

I was born there too. Really, I was ACTUALLY BORN THERE. In case you're not  
getting the message. I AM SATONS DAUGHTER.

Here's your fridges! *hands three over* USE THEM WELL.

Can you dance? I want you to dance. *gets out big a** gun* DANCE MOTHERF*****!

Ok, bye :D

-joy2theworlddannyphantom

**Satan's Daughter:**

**Hellz Ya I can dance! Ya kiddin me? :D**

**~Mello**

* * *

Hi!

Just one question: y r u obsessed with chocolate?

Btw ur sexy ;)

-Deathnoteluver

**Deathnoteluver:**

**I'm obsessed with chocolate cuz it is the most delicious damn thing this planet has ever met! duh... ;)**

**Haha thanks! **

**~Mello**

* * *

hiiiiiiiii! my first time! *gives chocolate bar*

sooooo have you ever read a melloxnear fic? IF SO HOW U FEEL about it!

what about mattxmello?

-my-friends-call-me-north-Italy

**my-friends-call-me-north-Italy:**

**Thanks for the chocolate! *eats happily***

**Yes...sadly I have...And it ABSOLUTELY INFURIATES ME! Seriously? I hate that little bitch!**

**And MattXMello is sexxxxyyyyy! ;D**

**~Mello**

* * *

**More reviewsies? lol i'm really hyper rite now... ;D**


	7. Chapter 7

**HOLA! More questions and answers! :D**

**dont own deathnote and Mello swears...get the hell over it**

* * *

Hi Mello! My name is K8 Dunn, and I'd like to ask you a few questions.

1.) If Near was presented to you in a fashion in which he could do nothing,  
and you were allowed to torture him for 1 hour, what methods would you use?

2.) Have you ever considered using a weapon other than a gun or a bomb? Like a  
machete or a chainsaw?

3.) What was the spark that brought you and Matt together?

4.) If you could change one aspect about yourself, what would it be? (It  
cannot be being number one, you're already a huge winner.)

5.) Have you ever considered changing your name?

I apologize for the mass amount of questions, but they had to be expressed.

~K8 Dunn

**K8 Dunn:**

**1. First I would tear off his left foot and use it to kick him in the head, and then rip out his tongue...Then I would proceed to rip the rest of his limbs off...hopefully before he dies of blood loss because I want him to enjoy every minuet of it. *smiles sweetly* Oh, I sound like BB! Gross!**

**2. A chainsaw would be fucking awesome! They make too much noise though... :'(**

**3. Hmmm tough to say. One day I looked at him and saw more than just a friend...I guess years of friendship brought us together. Not entirely sure what you're going for here... ;)**

**4. Probably get this dumb-ass scar off my face.**

**5. No! My name rocks! ionic though it may be... ;D**

**~MELLO**

* * *

ahhh, mello, I love you so

MattxMello pretty much my favorite DN paring, cause lets face it,  
badass+badass=Chuck Norris. But seriously (but not sirius-ly), ON WITH THE  
QUESTIONS (HUZZAH)!

1)If you had to choose between a life time supply of chocaolate, and getting  
Matt to yourself for hours when he's wearing a frilly lolita dress, which  
would you choose? (you cannot have both)

2)The eternal question: Coke or Pepsi

3)Read any mangas? Favorite?

4) My friend, whom I call Miheal for identity reasons because he has ALMOST  
the exact same name, wants to tell you that you're awesome, and he loves you,  
but in a completely manly and not at all rape-y way...yeah

5) And now the obligatory unicorn question: If you found out that Near is  
actually a unicorn, what would your reaction be?

You are my life now (this is a joke, and if anyone gets the refrence you make  
me very happy),

~BeautifulLie1313

**BeautifulLie1313:**

**Yes MelloXMatt rocks but I disagree...badass+badassChuck Norris =P**

**Ugh as much as I would die without chocolate...Matt in a Lolita dress would be fucking sexy!**

**Coke...definitely coke**

**Just finished FMA (full metal alchemist) and it was awesome! Just started Bleach and that one's good too...**

**I siriusly love you too almost-Miheal!**

**I would shoot him on the spot no questions asked...**

**Ugh twilight reference...KILL ME NOW! ;D**

**~Mello**

* * *

1) On a scale of 1 to go die, how pissed would you be if I asked your  
thoughts on unicorns?

2) What is your favorite David Bowie song?

3) Y U NO LIEK FIERRO ROCHEIRE?

4) Hey guys hey guys, are you guys making a movie?

5) I would like to be a character in the movie

~Slenderman

**Slenderman:**

**1. GO DIE!**

**2. Don't listen to him...I'll look him up sometime though!**

**3. talk english...I have no frickin idea what you're talking about...**

**4. yes. yes we are...**

**5. yes. yes you can...**

**~Mello**

* * *

so mello... if you were stuck in a room, no guns, no chocolate and your room  
mate had to be kira or near, who would you choose?

Also would you ever coslay misa?

LOTSA CHOCOLATE FOR YOU!*throws a bag of chocolate at you*

LASTLY, do you play robot unicorn?^0^

-KittieShade

**KittieShade:**

**I would choose Kira, and strangle that bitch! Who says you need a gun to kill someone?**

**Hellz ya I would cosplay Misa! She's the only other character in death note with a sense of style!**

**THANKS FOR THE CHOCOLATE!**

**and yes I do...I freaking rock at it! ;D**

**~MELLO**

* * *

ARGHHHHHH! MY BROTHER DIED MY HAIR WHITE! Now I look like Near... TT-TT

My hair was BLONDE. It wasn't as awesome as yours but... BLONDE.

I like you. NOW DANCE. DANCE, NOW.

Would you go a month locked in a cage which you can't get out of without  
CHOCOLATE. Or kiss Near. Cheek, lips, whatever.

I'm allergic to chocolate. I can't be like you. Waa.

*huggles without a care of personal space* :D

BYE BYE! *poofs away in black smoke*

~joy2theworlddannyphantom

**joy2theworlddannyphantom:**

**Haha that SUUUCKKKKSS! Blonde hair is totally the coolest!**

***dances***

**Ohhh dear fucking lord...A month without chocolate would be PAINFUL! GAHH! Near! but on the cheek dammit!**

**Dude, that sucks! Chocolate is the only thing worth living for...no. I'm serious!  
**

**BYE!**

**~Mello**

* * *

Review or I'll send Mello after you...


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: I was sad beacuse I got no more questions then I realized that someone spammed ... :) anyways, here you go!**

**Warning: language**

**OOooohhhhh! and thank you to ****joy2theworlddannyphantom for asking questions pretty much every chapter...love ya!  
**

* * *

*Gives choclate*

IT WAS SO HARD FOR ME NOT TO EAT THAT!

Ok so for questions:

1) What is your opinion on- oh that's already been asked... MOVING ON!

2) I am having a bad day... I can has hug?

3) On a scale of 1 to choclate times infinity, how much do you love Matt?

4) Now wasn't this fun? *hug*

-animecookiefairy

**animecookiefairy:**

**Thanks for the chocolate!**

**1. ahhhhhhhhhh...thanks for not finishing that sentence **

**2. mayy-be...fine...all right *hugs***

**3. Chocolate times GOOGLE! that's how much I love Mattie ;D _(a/n for peoples that don't know thats 10 w/ a million zeros...yeah big!)_**

**4. Yeah...sure *hugs again***

**~Mello**

**_(a/n- i love your pen name!)_  
**

* * *

I know... poor me... missing out on blonde hair and chocolate.

1) Cheese or Matt in a 'slutwear' dress?

2) Be trapped in a room with me or Near. And you can't kill anyone. Yes, my  
hair is still white.

3) *throws skittles* TASTE THE RAINBOW!

4) M 'n' M's XD

5) Sing World domination by ash.

6) Meet Lillie, my tiger.

Lillie: Rawr.

Me: Lillie doesn't like Light-bulb Imagay. She likes you!

Mmm. Yeah I'm done. BYE!

-joy2theworlddannyphantom

**joy2theworlddannyphantom**

**1. Chese is nasty! Matt in a frickin dress! hellz ya!**

**2. you. you. you. you. you. :)**

**3. *Throws Recces Cups* taste the peanut butter bitch!**

**4. haha**

**5. No. I refuse.**

**6. Hi Lillie! *hugs tiger***

**WHO DOES LIKE LIGHT? Lillie: you have good taste!**

**~Mello :D**

* * *

1: Do you have any weird fetish?

2: how would you feel if Matt cheated on you?

I personally think that you are so much better than Near, because your human  
and has real emotions. Thats it.

Bye bye!

-So-i-herd-you-like-chocolate

**So-i-herd-you-like-chocolate:**

**1. mmmmm...leather...and guns! ;D**

**2. I would be pissed off and sad...but mostly pissed off!**

**Haha thank you!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

I really like this xD

Here are my questions

Near isn't "awesomer" tHAN YOU XD You´re better than near xD Did you know  
that?

Why do you think that everybody keeps asking you your thoughts on unicorns?

Don´t you think It´s frustrating?

What would you do if you ever find out that you´re an unicorn?

last question...you´re dead so...if you have to haunt someone who would that  
person be?

-monica perry

**monica perry:**

**Thanks! Yes I did know that I was better! Thank yew!  
**

**Because the're anoying as f*ck?**

**Yes, I throw up in my mouth a little every time someone says the 'U word'... ;D**

**That would be a sad, sad day...**

**ahhhhh...good question...I think I would haunt Light Imagay until he died...and in the meantime make his life living hell!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

**A/N :D**


	9. Chapter 9

Konnichiwa! I am ChocolateMafia (don't you just love that name? :D), Matt &  
Mello fan forever! Just to let know... *points to Matt fangirl badge* But you  
can still keep Mattie since you're awesome too. ^3^ On with the questions!

1. Doesn't it annoy you like fuck when someone creates a MelloxNear fic? . I  
mean really... Get some taste, people! MattxMello is far superior. ;)

2. What's your most favorite brand of chocolate ever in the universe? Mine is  
Ghirardelli.

3. Put these in order from least favorite to favorite: milk chocolate, dark  
chocolate, white chocolate. I've always wondered which kind you like best.  
(I'm making a DN fic and I just have no idea. That's why I'm asking.)

4. Uni-Just kidding. XD What's your opinion on narwhals? I'm starting a new  
mythical creature trend!

5. Why are you and Matt so fucking badass and sexy? You two have been my fave  
anime guys ever since I watched Death Note cause of this.

6. Lastly (I like that word too), have you ever tried playing video games? I  
mean, I know Matt loves video games like a fat kid loves cake, so I was  
wondering if you ever tried them. Even ONCE.

Well, that's all! ChocolateMafia out! *puts on sunglasses* I'll be back.

-ChocolateMafia

**ChocolateMafia:**

**Hi, and I adore your name...A ten on a scale of one to completly badass**

**1. yes, it absolutly does annoy the fuck out of me! I can't see how in hell people can think we would ever be compatible!**

**2. Well any Swiss chocolate is _amazing_ but for American I have nothing against plain old Hersheys :)**

**3. Milk is the best, dark chocolate is okayish, but the person who invented white chocolate deserves to be shot! Seriously? It's not even real chocolate!**

**4. THANK YOU! *kisses* Our world need more creative people like you! And narwhals are pretty fucking sweet!**

**5. Haha thanks! I don't know...we were just born awesome I guess!**

**6. Matt has _made_ me try on several occasions...but personally? I would rather shoot a real person with a real gun! ;D**

**~Mello**

* * *

Hi!

*gives you chocolate*

Now, lots of questions

1. what do you think about Matt x Near?

2. same one, about L x Light?

3. once again, about Gevanni x Near?

4. cake or candy?

5. if, Matt turn away from you for Near, what will you do?

Okay...

-ChocoStrawberry

**ChocoStrawberry:**

**THANKS for the chocolate!**

**1. HATE HATE HATE! Mattie is all mine bitches!**

**2. Disgusting! The only person I have ever admired with KIRA!**

**3. EWWWW! He's easily three times Nears age!**

**4. Candy!**

**5. Shoot that bastard, and by bastard I mean Near...**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Hey! I'm back. You were warned. (Aw. I was thanked :D)

So... if Matt+Mello= What does Near+death= ? I bet its a happy Mello.

I ran head first into a wall. Can you go through walls?

I'm giving you Lillie. Take care of her, remember to 'accidentally' let her  
lose near Light-bulb Imagay. She loves chasing that idiot.

Waffles or pancakes?

Chasing Near with a gun or chasing a naked Matt? (Ha. I bet this one's hard)

Matt in a dress (I've got a weird addiction to seeing anime men in dresses  
O.o) or Near about to fall of a cliff?

AHH! *dodges peanut butter* I'd rather not as I possibly still have nut  
allergies. TT-TT Why does the world hate me?

I got my hair back. MY BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HAIR THAT LOOKS LIKE YOURS JUST NOT AS  
GOOD! :D :D :D !

Um, yeah I'm done. Heres Lillie! *hands over the tiger*

Lillie: Rawr :D

Me: Awe. She likes you! BI BI! *poofs away in black silk smoke*

-joy2theworlddannyphantom

**joy2theworlddannyphantom: Hola once again!**

**Fuck ya Near+Death equals happy me! Deliriously happy me!**

**Well I can now I guess...being technically a ghost...**

**Ohhhh thank you! *hugs Lillie* I'll be sure to!**

**Waffles with chocolate syrup! **

**Ohhhh that is hard...well I guess Ma...no wait Ne...Maaa...Ahhhh I dont know! They both sound like so much fun! ;D**

**Hahahaha Matt in a fucking dress!**

**heh heh...sorry bout the Recces...and congrats bout ur hair :D welcome to the super bad-ass blonde club!**

***hugs Lillie***

**BYE**

**~Mells**

* * *

XD guess what, Mello? I'm currently in Wammy's!

MELLO I FRIGGIN LUV U! *gives chocolate*

1) If you were in a dark room and had to choose who to rape between me and  
Matt who would it be? You can choose both ;D

2)Sparkly vampires don't exist! D: what is your opinion on them?(hates  
twighlight)

3)If you played dominos with Near instead of getting your face blown up would  
you be thankful?

4)Does Matt have a big dick?

5)Do YOU have a big dick? :3

6)I luv u so much, know you're real name, and am currently the same age as  
you. You can still rape Mattie but can I carry your heir?

LUV U SO MUCH, MIHA- MELLO!

~Beyond Belief (2ndBB)

**BeyondBeleif13:**

**Haha I friggin love you too! *eats chocolate* thanks!**

**Hmmm much as I love you I would have to choose Mattie...**

**They suck. Twilight needs to go die and all of the fangirls need to go soak their heads!**

**Yeah probably! This scar sucks shit!**

***smirks* Wouldn't you like to know.**

**Yeah sure...**

**Thank you for not finishing that name...otherwise I would have to hunt you down... and we wouldn't want that now would we? ;D**

**~MELLO!**

* * *

Hi Mello! I just want to say that love chocolate to, but you eat a lot more  
than me. That's ok though. ^.^ *Gives you 30 pounds of chocolate* Help I can't  
carry it all!

1. What do you look in a girl/boy.

2. How do you write to us? I mean... well you being dead and all. No offense.

3. Can you tell Matt I said hi, and that I just dominated the new Zelda game.

4. What are some secerts about Matt?

5. ... Can you explain Matt's goggles... I'm confused.

Thanks, and can I have a hug. I'm shy sorry. *blushes*

-YaoiLoverDeathNote1

**YaoiLoverDeathNote1:**

**OHMYGOSH! Thank you! **

**1. Looks, Intelligence, and I'm not gonna lie...sex appeal ;)**

**2. I'm a ghost if you must know.**

**3. Matt says hi and congrats...and then he started blabbing on about some Zelda level and I tuned him out. ;D**

**4. He's amazing in bed...not sure how big of a secret that is...**

**5. He thinks they look badass...He is severely mistaken...**

**Yeah course! *hugs***

**~Mello**

* * *

What is your favorite movie?

-SOMETIMESISTAREATPEOPLE

**SOMETIMESISTAREATPEOPLE:**

**Gladiator! **

**and sometimes I stare at people too ;)**

**~Mello**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N-Hi peoples! I totally forgot to do this on the last chapter so i'll do it twice**

**I don't own deathnote or Matt (wish I did..) or Call of Duty**

**I don't own deathnote or Matt (wish I did..) or Call of Duty**

**Reviews? ;D**

* * *

Okay so I'm back with more choclate!

You're sexy btw. Yeah, I love saying that randomly to sexy people. :D

And you know your fangirls are awesome, don't lie.

Okay, now for questions.

1) I can poof you up any kind of cookie! (cause I'm a cookie fairy, it's my  
job) What would you like?

2) Do you like dragons? My friend does.

3) *hands you Near plushie* tear it up all you want! I got that just for you!

4) Do you think I might be a stalker?

...That's all I can think of for now! BYE! *gives you more choclate then poofs  
away in an explosion of cookies*

-animecookiefairy

**animecookiefairy:**

**Hola! I missed you! And yeah my fangirls totally rock my world...sort of...**

**Triple chocolaty chocolate chip! Good luck with that one!**

**Yes dragons are awesome! I'd be cool to flame random assholes that annoy you!**

**Rawr...*bites head off of Near* What? Don't judge me bitch!**

**Yes...most likely**

**adios!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

PIZZA.

I had pizza, and it was STOLEN. D:

My brother says I ate it, but I know better than that.

HELP ME FIND MY PIZZA!

Why am I asking you? Easy. You are a better detective than Near. That's why.

How's Lillie?

Do you like Pizza?

How's Matt?

Oh yeah, I forgot! *somehow brings you and Matt back to life but with ghostly  
powers* YAY! *huggles* now you've defeted death. BEAT THAT NEAR! XD

Do you want me to get rid of your scar? I think it makes you look more badass,  
is that even possible?

Matt or chocolate?

*hands 4695200 kilos of chocolate* help yourself. It's not like I can eat it.  
TT^TT

Do you think I'm crazy?

Allow me to point something out that you've probably never realised before.  
And don't lie and say you have.

Therapist.

T-h-e-r-a-p-i-s-t.

The-rapist.

The rapist.

Therapist.

O.o

Yeah. Scary.

Ok I'm done, BYE! *flies away using black angel like wings*

-joy2theworlddannyphantom

**joy2theworlddannyphantom:**

**That is an incredibly easy question...your pizza is in your sock drawer...duh. Where else would it be? And your brother is an idiot...**

**Matt's really good...*suddenly gets brought back to life* YES! SUCK IT NEAR! oh yeah I forgot...thank you!**

**Hmmm...*thinks* I'll keep it. You're right it is pretty badass!**

**Matt covered in chocolate :)**

**Thanks for the chocolate again! Man, I love fangirls!**

**Yes, you are crazy...why else would you be having a conversation with a no-longer-dead anime character? huh?**

**0.o well I can't say that doesn't make sense...cree-py!**

**You make the most dramatic exits!**

**~Mello!**

* * *

I'm baaack! And thanks. :) You were the main reason behind me making this  
name. My friend says I have problems with trying to be too badass like M&M.  
*shrugs* But then again, she was the one who said that you were too girly for  
her and said Matt was a bit... well, pathetic since he barely appeared in  
Death Note. I have to remind myself everyday why I tell her about Death Note  
stuff.

We agree then! I hate Near, so... MelloxNear makes me want to bang my head  
against a wall repeatedly. Ugh, choke me with a spoon.

I have been deprived! D: I haven't tried Swiss chocolate in my life. But then  
again, I live in a small town, so... Yeah. I live in the middle of fucking  
huge mountains that take hours to get over, even by car. You can tell I live  
in the West. *sighs*

Finally, someone who agrees! I like dark and all, but milk is just the shiz.  
White chocolate is just... *chokes self to show emphasis* Ooooh, speaking of  
types of chocolate, have you ever tried intense dark chocolate before?

Yay, I got a kiss~! Beat that, other fangirls! I agree, narwhals are pretty  
fucking sweet.

That's what I thought. And you're welcome. 3

I'm a gamer myself (I'm not an addictive gamer, I'm more casual on that.) but  
I have to agree, shooting real people with real guns beats the hell out of  
doing it on a game. If only it was legal to actually shoot people... so many  
people would be dead. (Including Near. :D Oh wait, I have to leave him for you  
to beat to death... darn.)

Ha, I write long letters. That just shows you I take my time to write these  
things to send to you because I think you're awesome and deserve it.

Almost forgot! QOTD: If I said your real name right now with all these people  
here, what would you do? Hunt me down? ;)

-ChocolateMafia

**ChocolateMafia:**

**I hate your friend! Yes, tell her that! And tell her I will be visiting her house some dark night with a gun...heh heh heh...call me girly will you?**

**You are a deprived child! Living in the middle of nowhere sucks!**

**I havn't tried intense dark chocolate before...I'll send Matt to the store to get some... ;D**

**Shooting people is awesome! That's all I'm adding to that...And I will beat Near someday...in MANYYYYY ways... heh heh heh**

**Yes I would find you and kill you...**

**Have a nice day ;D**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Hi Mello!

Wait, that sounded horrible...

Hello Mello, you badass motherfucker!

There we go...

I'm sad. I'm still not at the part in Death Note where you and Matt appear. Oh  
and Near too I suppose. But he sounds like a little bitch to me so he doesn't  
matter. But I have friends who have watched DN and I read fanfiction about  
characters I don't know yet, so I still know you! Ha!

Here *hands Mello a few bottles of Resurrection Elixir from Star Ocean, the  
videogame I'm playing right now* Now you and Matt and whoever else you want  
can be alive again. I refuse to accept your death.

Anways, questions!

1) I shall follow ChocolateMafia's trend and ask you, what do you think of  
narwhals?

2) Now, to start a new one, what do you think of phoenix's?

3) Are you good at spelling?

4) I'm thinking of getting my hair cut like yours (I also have blonde hair).  
What do you think?

5) What kind of music do you listen to?

...That's all I can think of for now, but I'm sure I'll send in another review  
sometime.

Here *gives Hershey kiss from my advent calender*

I feel my pride draining away with this request but can I please have a hug?

Bye.

-OwlsFlyHigh

**OwlsFlyHigh:**

**READ FASTER! Me and Mattie are the best things that ever happened to this series! And Near is a little bitch! *gets brought back to life again* SWEET! Second time today!**

**Narwhals are still amazing but Phoenixes are the best!**

**Hellz Ya! I rock at spelling!**

**That would be awesome! Maybe it would almost be as amazing as mine...nah ;)**

**Heavy metal and rock mostly**

**Thank you for the kiss! *kisses***

**May-be...*hugs***

**Bye**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Thanks Mello! When we were hugging *yes I have replayed it about 7,000 times  
in my mind* you smelled like chocolate... It smelled really good *thinks of  
some pervy things* Um excuseme for a moment, I have a nose bleed.

Ok! I'm back with more questions.

1. Do you like girls with brown hair, brown eyes, big boobs, and skinny?  
*blushes*

2. Can you and Matt do a dance for me?

3. Why don't you like your real name?

4. Tommorrow is your b-day! So happy early birthday! So how are you going to  
celebrate?

5. Do you have any pets?

6. If you, me, and matt were stuck in a room for a day what would you do?

7. Creepy. I know a person who looks like Near. No joke. what should I do? He  
creeps me out...

8. Do you like motorcycles?

Thanks! Yes I'm a pervert and I'm proud. I'm kinda shy though... Be back  
later!

-YaoiLoverDeathNote1

**YaoiLoverDeathNote1:**

**Um thanks i guess...thats not creepy at all... ;)**

**Yes! That is exactly my type of girl...how did you guess?**

**May-be...**

**I have nothing against my given name...I simply needed an alias so I wasn't killed by Kira...*Punches something at thought of Kira***

**Thank you! Chocolate cake of course...assuming Matt even remembers...he's been busy for the past week playing C.O.D. Black Opps...grrrrrr**

**Nope! They would only get in the way**

**Haha..interesting question...I'll kidnap you and Matt tomorrow and we can find out *smiles evilly* how does that sound?**

**Kidnap him and bring him to me...heh heh heh ;D**

**They totally rock!**

**Adios!**

**~Mello**

* * *

**A/N- hello!**

**goodbye!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Hi! Haven't done a chapter recently! I sorta put off all of the work due b4 christmas break until the last 3 days sooo yeah...been supa busy!**

**Disclamer: I don't own deathnote**

**Ohhhh I also found Mello a 'theme song' of sorts... go look up _Faint_ by Linkin Park...The first time I listened to it i was like 'ahhhh that's so MELLO!'**

**Kays, enjoy!**

* * *

First, in one of these questions, you seem to have made a couple of spelling  
errors. "2. Yes I feel bad for killing all of those people, the SPK and  
Japanese police force especially and the President not so much (fucking  
coward)...but I considered them all NECCICARY scrifices to stop Kira." And  
then you ripped on a questioner for spelling something wrong?

Second, Near has a crush on you. I'm being serious. I don't even like the  
pairing of you with Near, but this is based on FACTS. Pure FACTS! Ohba  
(creator) even hinted at it, saying Near took a lot of time making your little  
finger puppet thing because he likes you.

I know you like Mattie, but give Near a break! He freaking loves you!

My question for you...

When and why do you dress the way you do? at Wammy's, if you remember, you  
wore a black long sleeved shirt and pants. Now, it's smexxi leather. Why?

-VermillionStar

**VermillionStar:**

**First of all I didn't rip on a questioner for making a spelling error; I ripped on them for sending an irritating question with a MADE UP word...there is a lot of difference between spelled wrong and completely made up.**

**I disagree. Near is too emotionless to have a crush on anyone...And I too read that part of the book and took it to mean that Near admired and respected me...NOT crushing on me...gross!**

**Hahaha. Nice question. Intimidation mostly...how do you think I rose through the ranks of the mafia so fast, huh?**

**~Mello**

* * *

O.O I want to find out. Badly... O/O

For your birthday present I bought you a chocolate man from that old Axe  
commercial. Hope you like it!

1. What do you think of the yoai stories about you/Matt and you/Near?

2. In your opinion are fangirls better than the mafia?

3. Any nicknames you'd prefer to be called?

4. Dirt you've got on Near?

5. Favorite game, book, anime ect.?

6. A commanly used threat from you.

7. Give Matt a kiss for me...

Thanks for everything! I'm still waiting for my dance!

-YaoiLoverDeathNote1

**YaoiLoverDeathNote1:**

**Haha awesome! Thanks!**

**1. Me/Matt...*blushes* Me and Near? GAHHHH!**

**'re certainly more entertaining...and they bring me chocolate...**

**3. NOOO!**

**4. Sadly not really...he's just too damn perfect!**

**5. Reading Full Metal Alchemist right now...it's pretty badass!**

**7. =P will do!**

**Adios!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

I'm with you I don't like Near either.

Okay I've got some questions!

Where did you get Zeb? Also how much do you like Zeb?

Did you and Halle ever have something going on?

How did you get into the mafia?

How did you get into the US after you left Wammy's?

Have you ever wanted to meet Naomi since you wrote the book about her?

And completely random

What would you do in a zombi apocalypse?

Thanks in advance!

-tebrighteyes

**tebrighteyes:**

**Thanks for that!**

**I'm kind of confused who Zeb is...**

**Nope! We're just friends and always have been. :)**

**Long story...I left Wammy's and was cold and hungry, so I started dealing for money (don't judge me!) and made some 'connections' and one thing lead to another...**

**I kind of stole money for a plane ticket...**

**No. She's annoying.**

**HAHAHAHA! Fucking shoot 'em!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Hi again!

*give you choco~* wait a minute, its getting old to give you chocolate!

*take the chocolate back* *give you chocholate flavored candies* because you  
say you like candy =D

now, questions

1. Do you have other reason(s) for hating near? Other than 'he beat me' thing?

2. Ever thing about different life? More 'normal' life like university life?  
with Matt of course

3. If near completely disappear from deathnote canon, what do you think, will  
happen?

4. Harry Potter or Naruto?

*pointed at calendar* December 13th! Right now is December 13th! Happy  
Birthday Mello! *throw lot of confetti around while happily singing 'happy  
birthday'* now, present *hand you big box* its doraemon's magic pocket, you  
can find anything you want inside it!

okay...

-ChocoStrawberry

**ChocoStrawberry:**

**Thanks! You are the second person to give me something other then chocolate...not that I really mind...**

**1. He's too emotionless; It's creepy, unnatural, and drives me crazy.**

**2. Not really, I set out to destroy Kira and become L and I stuck to it.**

**3. I WOULD BE NUMBER ONE!**

**4. Harry Potter all the way!**

**Thank you thank you thank you! OOHHHHH COOOOL! ;D**

**~MELLO**

* * *

*looks in sock draw and see's pizza* ...Did you put it there?

*brings L back to life* Awe. He looks so cute when he's sleeping...

Badassness it is then.

*Naked Matt covered in Chocolate poofs in front of you* Happy Birthday! XD

*bows down* We fangirls will tend to your every need. Well, most of us anyway.

Mm. I knew it.

I'm still not going to the-rapist's though.

*Eyes glow red wings shed to blood red scales, thin purple snake like tongue  
hisses before flying out* DRAMATIC EXIT!

-joy2theworlddannyphantom

**joy2theworlddannyphantom:**

**Of course! I'm so evil...**

**Yummy! Matt!**

**Damn girl! DRAMA QUEEN!**

**~Mells**

* * *

Mello! Why didn't you tell her! your b-day isn't today! Isn't it the day after  
christmas? (Yes, I keep tabs on all your birthdays)

Mello is supposed to be turning 13 Dec.26

Then my birthday is next (My alias is Manx so maybe that is why you didn't see  
me, I'll say hi!) Jan.20

Then Mattie's on Feb.2

Light-bulb, fucking, I'magay 2/28

Beyond Birthday's is Jun.13

Near's(grrr...) uh... I can't remember(checks list of all your real names,  
birthdays, sunsigns, height, weight, ect. that I keep secretly in my room)...  
June. 28

then, finally, L-kun on Oct.10th

TAKE THAT OTHER MELLO FANGIRLS! I get to bear his child :3

Oops! almost forgot! *gives you 1,000,000 life-size chocolate Matts* :3 engoy  
them to your pleasure

I recently did a study that you left Wammys sometime in November, turning 15  
in december. The year is going to be 2013 so if you take

15 12

2013 2010

I wanna go with you! *takes trusty pocketknife (it's a big one ;D) from in  
pants* I'll meet you at the gates tomorrow morning at 8:00

okay, get serious and do the questions!

1) What should we name our child? Michelle? XD

2)forget nerwals and phoenixes, what is your opinion on racoons(XD you know  
who I'm talking about)? sheep(pun intended)? what about gamers(XD I'm  
'punny'!)? What about cats(remember, alias is Manx)?

3)Will you kidnap me too? PLZ?

4)What is your opinion on life?

5)If I told you Near is 'ok' would you bitch-slap me? *rips head off Near  
plushie, just for you*

*kisses Mello plushie all over*

Meet me in the closet tommorrow at 5:00 and drag me into your room plz :3 I'm  
stayin in there all night :3

~Manx

**Manx:**

**Wows! Long Reveiw! And that's kinda creepy you know all our birthdays...(stalker)**

**OK! 8:00 tomorrow it is!**

**anyways...questions...**

**1. Phoenix! boy or girl, I don't really give a shit...**

**2. Raccoons are okayish, sheep suck, gamers rock my world, and cats are fucking awesome!**

**3. Sure thing! God! I need to get a special room for all the kidnapped fangirls...**

**4. Life's a bitch and then you die.**

**5. Hmmm may-bee...but you redeemed yourself by destroying that studpid doll! (I refuse to say 'plushie')**

**Okay! It's a date!**

**Bye for now!**

**~mElLo**

* * *

*Looks at headless Near plushie* That was... pretty awesome.

Anyways... guesss whoooo? *gives you super choclatey-chip cookie and more  
choclate* I love being a cookie fairy, I can poof up cookies and make the  
money for all that choclate! :D Oh, and you would be correct about the stalker  
thing. :D

1) Are you scared of me yet? 0.o

2) Time to be creative! What's your opinion on FLYING RAINBOW MONKEY ZEBRA  
HYBRIDS?

3) Omg! Matt's gone n' ate all your choclate! But somehow, he's gotten it all  
over himself! WHAT DO YOU DO?

Yeah, that's all for now! *gives you more choclate and poofs away in a  
cookie-explosion*

animecookiefairy

**animecookiefairy:**

**AHHHH it's her again! RUUUNNNNNNN!**

**Haha just kidding... ;D Danke!**

**1. I am Mello! I fear nothing!**

**2. AHHHHHH FUCKING RUNNNNN! NEAR HAD CHILDREN! *smirks*  
**

**3. Lick it all off...duh!**

**Adios!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

1: Do you consider yourself dominant or submissive?

2: If you were a animal, what would you be?

-Cherries

**Cherries:**

**Definitely dominate!**

**Hmmm... maybe a lynx!**

**~Mello!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N Yay another chapter!**

**And I don't own...**

* * *

God!, you!, sexy-blonde-badass!

I fucking love you Mello!

And now, a few questions, yaaaay!

But before, I've got chocolate for you! *give him the chocolate*

1- Do you and Matt have...sexual relationships? xD

2- I wan't to rape you...Can I?...Ok, no...That's Mattie's job xD

3- Do you know that you are the best, MUCH MORE better than Near -fucking  
emotionless bitch!- ?

4- What do you prefer, Matt whit a lot of sex-toys or more chocolate?

5- Can you give me a hug :3?

Well, Bye!

-xXxLil'DarkxXx

**xXxLil'DarkxXx:**

**Um hi. I love you too i guess...OH! Thank you!**

**1. Heh heh...may-be... =P**

**2. Fuck no! I don't even know you! and damn right that Matt's job!**

**3. Yes I did know that...thank you. :D**

**4. MATT! *smirks***

**5. *sigh* sure...*Hugs***

**~MELLO**

* * *

Zeb is the name given to the zebra printed couch that you had in the mafia  
hidout. It even has its own fan page on deviant art. Seriously.

okay so do you remember your parents or ever think about them?

What do you think you'd be doing if the Kira case never happened?

If you went to college what would you major in?

And I just thought of something you can hold over Near's head. He's a voice  
in the new My Little Pony series, Spike, the baby dragon. I'm a My Little  
Pony fan so I had to point that out.

Thanks again and hope you had a great birthday!

-tebrighteyes

**tebrighteyes:**

**Oh right...sorry...I forget our couch has a name sometimes...And I try to stay as far away from devian art as humanly possible...waaayyy too many fangurls...**

**Hmmm...not really. They died when I was really little and I don't really care anymore.**

**Still try to become L.**

**Something like criminal investigation...**

**Ah-hahahahahahaha! :D Thats the funniest thing I've heard in a loonnnngggg time!**

**I did thanks!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Meow.

I AM HALF SHINIGAMI! KHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA- *chokes*

:D I'm not a queen. YOU ARE THE KING!

1) I say black, you say...?

2) I say Linkin Park, you say...?

3) I say Evenescence, you say...?

4) I say me myself and I, you say...?

5) I say Danny Phantom, you say...?

6) You call me a freak, I say 'When did you find out?'

7) What do you think of that above?

8) Meow.

9) Woef.

10) King of Chocolate Mafia. :D

11) Matt, Queen of video games.

12) Who's the more femenine one in your relationship?

13) If Near had emotions, would you rethink your hate for him?

14) Are you worried Matt will get Cancer?

15) I like cheese.

16) Do you eat anything else than chocolate?

17) *gives homemade oat cookies* try them.

DRAMATIC EXIT! *holds arms out and disappears in a tornado of blood*

-joy2theworlddannyphantom

**joy2theworlddannyphantom:**

**1. Black?**

**2. Blink 182**

**3. Nickleback**

**4. AHHHH**

**5. Run!**

**6. A long time ago**

**7. *smirk* entertaining**

**8. Grrrrr**

**9. Hiiiissss**

**10. Yep!**

**11. HAHAHAHA**

**12. Matt duh!**

**13. Yeah, I would only extremely dislike him...**

**14. A little bit i guess.**

**15. no**

**16. Gummy worms! Of the sour variety!**

**17. Okay...*spits out* blegh! Too healthy!**

**WOOOOWWWWWW! *amazed face***

**~MELLO**

* * *

O: you know I'm not a stalker! I'm just at Wammys and do all my reasearch! In  
someone elses you said if you were an animal oyu'd be a Lynx, and I chose  
Manx, as you know, for my alias :3

ON TO THE QUESTIONS! HUZZAH!

1)any words of advice for the world?

2)when I said "raccoons" did you know I meant L? you said "ok-ish", don't you  
look up to L? Isn't that the reason you strive to beat Near?

3)did I remember to give you these? *gives you 1,000,000,000 lifesize  
chocolate Matts*

4)your opinion on fangirls?

5)Do you know what pikmin are? If so, what is your opinion on them? "POWER OF  
SLAVERYYY!"(inside joke for those who watched ChuggaaConroy's Pikmin  
walkthrough)

6)If you met a sheep (actual one) and it shitted on your boots, what would you  
name it? XD

7)do you think my reviews are too long? if so, would you like me to shorten  
them from now on?

8)If you were a pokemon trainer, what pokemon (any region) would you choose  
for a starter?

9)Would you do me a favor and not die again? *gives you Phoenix Down*

Luvz you always,

~Manx

**Manx:**

**Interesting...we could be twins...**

**1. To the world: QUIT FUCKING IT UP!**

**2. I suppose you could say I look up to him...I don't really admire him personally though. I simply strive to inherit his title.**

**3. THANK YOU THANK YOU! *kisses***

**4. Entertaining and they give me chocolate. ;D**

**5. I don't...shame.**

**6. Near twin...**

**7. Ehh. They're fine...shorter than some actually...**

**8. Ummm...I don't really do Pokemon...That's Matt's forte...**

**9. Sure thing!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Hiii Mellow i baked a tripple choclolate cake wit chocolate icing for u  
since its my first time on here *gives cake*... so yeah im chocolateisourlife  
{do u like my name} and i think u r soooo smexy u put the sexy in smexy...and  
guess wat elce u can beat near in anything u wanted too and u know it...yeah  
so heres my qustions...  
1. y does everyone love unicorns...i dont...wat  
do u think about butterflies...i love butterflies...  
2. chocolate is the best thing in the world...i love  
chocolate it makes me hyper... why do u love chocolate soo much...

3. im a big gammer like matt maybe we could play that new call of duty game  
together...whats his favorite game... well thats all ill come back again...c  
ya.

-chocolateisourlife

**chocolateisourlife:**

**Hi! Thanks! You are my favorite type of person...the chocolate bearing type! And yeah your name is cool!**

**1. Butterflys are okay...a little annoying...**

**2. Cuz it's delicious...duh!**

**3. Black Opps...Please play with him! Then maybe he'll shut up about me playing with him! Thank you! ;D**

**~Mello**

* * *

**A/N How do you make Lady Gaga mad?**

**Poke 'er face!**

**AHAHAHAHA!**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N Hi People! Yeah this is kinda late...sorry. I had to update My Fallen Angel which I haven't updated in a LONG time...You all should check it out. ;D Okay...done self-advertising now.  
**

**I don't own deathnote and may swear sometimes...**

**Anyways...Here you go.**

**Ohhhh...Happy New Years! 2011! :D  
**

* * *

1. could you kill near for me? my friend thinks he's awsome and keeps going to  
10 with him(check confessions of georgia nicolson series)

2. could you hook me up with Beyond? Pleeze? i'll give you chocolate!

-chaos

chaos:

**Sure thing i'll kill that idiot for you. He's been really bugging me lately. :)**

**2. Um...sure I guess...personally he really creeps me out but if thats what you want...**

**~MELLO**

* * *

...:D

You didn't care when I said I was a Shinigami hybrid. YAY!

1) Near. Define him in three words.

2) Did you get it?

Colour

Boy band

girl band

Prep or self

Super hero

Random saying.

SO CUTE

B*tch.

3) I LIKE GAMMON.

4) *summons tornado of blood* You wanna turn? :3

5) I FEEL CUTE!

6) Finish the lyrics:

I feel pretty, oh so pretty, so pretty and witty and...?

Invasion so succexy, so...?

7) Hannah Monta must DIE. WHY DIDN'T ANYONE PUT HER IN THE DEATHNOTE? OR ZAC  
EFRON? OR MILEY CYRUS? OR ROBERT PATTERSON? OR JUSTIN BEIBER!

Bye! *turns into a snake and turns to smoke*

-joy2theworlddannyphantom

joy2theworlddannyphantom:

About you being a shinigami hybrid...I've been around people a lot weirder...trust me

**Near: Obnoxious, white (NOT RACIST), and numb**

**Ahhh no I didn't...**

**Color: black**

**Boy band: Blink 182 or Nickelback**

**Girl Band: Evanescence**

**Self**

**Super Hero: Spiderman!**

**Random Saying: Life's a bitch then you die...**

***sees tornado of blood* You really freak me out sometimes...**

**pretty and witty and Gay! Is that some comment about my sexuality? Not appreciated...**

**MY FEELINGS EXACTLY! I'll call Light-bulb up right now and ask him...oh wait, that idiot's dead too...my bad ;)**

**~Mello**

* * *

Hey Mello!

I would have asked you about unicorns but thats over done, and I would have  
asked you about narwhales, but that was also already done. So, instead I will  
ask you what you would think if all the countries of the world were  
personified. (Extra chocolate if you know what Im talking about)

How did you feel when you first heard that Matt was dead and did knowing that  
affect your decisions?

Okay last one:

If you found out that Kira/Light had multiple personality disorder, (Im sure  
there is an official name for it) would you have blamed Light for things that  
Kira did?

YOU ARE AWESOME!

OH! And here is a truck full of chocolate andd the key to Willy Wonkas  
chocolate factory that I totally did not steal!

LOVE YOU!

-Mudkiprox

**mudkiprox:**

**Wow. Kudos on asking creative questions...**

**Um countries of the world personified...That would be pretty cool...not exactly sure what you're talking about...**

**I felt really bad, it was essentially my fault that my friend was dead. It probably gave me a little less will to live and I wasn't quite as cautious.**

**Yes, a part of Light Yagami still killed all of those people. A good lawyer could probably get him out with an insanity defense though...**

***coff coff sure you didn't coff***

**Thanks!**

**~Mello!**

* * *

Ok immm baaaacccckkkk did u misss me...no too bad...i baked a german  
chocolate cake this time...hope u like it{gives cake}...sooo how is the most  
badass, chocolate king, matt lover, mafia god doing...yeah so heres my  
qustions...1. would u ever casplay as lady gaga...can i video tape it if u  
do...2. if matt died would u die with him...3. can u cook...can matt cook..i  
cant...4. ummmm do u thing im kinda crazy...5. am i annoying yet...6. can i be  
ur personall stalker...7. do u like crayons...8. im ust gonna ask ramodon  
qustions from now on is that ok...oh i forgot i also baked a chocolate bar  
shaped like a christmas tree for u and matt{gives chocolate} Marry Christmas  
you sexy blonde badass and ur sexy red head friend...bye for now...*rides away  
on bike but falls off 10sec. later...get back up and smils back at u and rides  
away again*

-chocolateisourlife

**chocolateisourlife:**

**The badass, chocolate king, matt lover, mafia god is doing fine thanks to your awesome cake.**

**1. FUCK NO!**

**2. Well yeah, I pretty much did.**

**3. No and no...we live on chocolate and take out ;D**

**4. yes**

**5. a little**

**6 yeah sure**

**7. i guess so, yep they're pretty cool :)**

**Oh thanks!**

**haha smoooth!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

hiya mello im hinamori andim going to ask you some qustions..(no duh)

but be for i do, i have something for you..(reaches in bag) i saw a special  
edition milk chocolate bar that was shaped like a unicorn and i just had to  
get it for you...(mwhahaha)

ok sorry sorry so heres my qustions...

do you like wearing leather, do you still ware leather durin the summer?

a scale of 1-10 how much do you like the video games matt plays all the  
time?

you think if you stoped wearin tight ass leather cloths people will  
stop mistakein you as a frickin girl

4.i love your hair..(haha)

actually super duper in love with you but you have matt so wats the point  
in onesided love...(its not very fun)

type of music do you listen to?

you only eat sweets like chocolate and sour gummy worms?

do you thing of this video link  
.com/watch?v=v0IaE98gkYU ?

9.i love matts hair too...(haha)

you tell matt that i would totaly kick his ass in black opps...

ok thats all for now, i hope you dont think im mean because im not i just like  
messin with peopel sorry...

well ok i'll come back soon...

later you smexy mafia boss.

-hinadear08

**hinadear08:**

**Wow...I can't decide weather to eat it or burn the unicorn reference...what the hell it's chocolate *eats quickly* :)**

**Yes, i just wear even less of it *smirks***

**on a scale of one to ten...hmmmm...a three.**

**Probably, but what fun would that be?**

**Thanks!**

**heavy metal and rock**

**Yeah, pretty much.**

***blushes* Um...That's really sweet. :3**

**Ok, Bye!**

**~MELLO**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N-Another chapter in one day...What the hell is wrong with me?**

**DoNt OwN DeAtHnOtE ;D**

* * *

Hey, Mello! :D

Your my totally fav character and so I have to ask some few things:

1. I don't know if someone else have noticed where you put your gun. Somewhere  
in the internet I saw something about it and I checked the manga and is true.  
(Yes, exactly where you have your...nuts) I am very curious about it. (I  
suffer everyday because my friend says it's because you have "deficiencies")  
What do you have to say?

2. I do seriously think near secretly love you! He even began to eat chocolate  
after you die. xD (sorry, have to say it)

3. Have someone ever confused you with a girl?

4. haha, did you know my mom's birthday is the same day as you? Am I wrong for  
be more excited that day because of your b-day?

5. You and Matt are so cute! *fangirl squeal*

That's all. Have some chocolate *throws*

-Lil-Blue-Tiger

**Little Blue Tiger: **

**1. Rumors...Purely rumors! And I hate your friend...yes _do_ tell her I said that.**

**2. Grrrrr...I refuse to reply to this.**

**3. *grumbles* They don't know the meaning of sexy.**

**4. That's awesome! And no that's not wrong...around here I guess it's perfectly normal. ;)**

**5. Yep**

**Bye,**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Hey awesome-and -kickass-character-of-death note

First of all- you are very sexy (sorry couldn't resist, had to write it:))

*throws 3 bars of swiss chocolate* I'll give ya more later.

Question time!

1)Bitter or sweet chocolate?

2)Blondes or Brunettes?

That's all for now. I'll return with more chocolate soon.

P.s. I gave you chocs- can I have a hug or a kiss?:3

-Dark Dark Chocolate

**Dark Dark Chocolate:**

***Smirks* thank you. **

**Yes! More chocolate! I never have to buy chocolate anymore...after all money doesn't grow on trees, but fangirls on the other hand...**

**1. SWEET! Bitter chocolate is so gross!**

**2. *ignores choices* Gingers...**

**Bye,**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Well I was playing Call Of Duty (Fuckin' awesome ) and the this creepy window  
came up... So yeah I decided to point out a couple things...

Why are you answering this questions?

Am I really femenine in our relationship?

Wow you said I'm amazing in bed *smirks* uh... Wanna have sex? :3

-Matt Yeah YOUR Matt

**Uh hi Matt…wow this is awkward…**

**Anyways…Maybe I'm answering these questions because I'm bored out of my fucking mind 'cause you play Call of Duty 24-fucking-7 and don't friggin talk to me.**

**Yes, you are feminine; you are the sorriest excuse for a man I have ever met, but I would love to have sex with you so TURN OFF THE DAMN GAMES! JESUS!**

**~Mells

* * *

**

DEAR LORD YOU ARE SO DARN SEXYYYYYYY!

And I have something for Near if you see him thell him this: SUCK IT YOU  
LITTLE BLEACH BRAT! THE 'M' IS BEFORE THE 'N' YOU ARE THE DAMN SECOND BEST  
FUCKIN ASSHOLE, GO GET RAPED BY A FREACKIN SHEEP!

Ok, that was creepy, but I JUST FUCKIN HATE HIM! (You understand me perfectly,  
don't you?)

Well, now the questions:

1) Will you go and rape Matty for meeee?

2) What would you do if I tell you that I'm your personal stalker?

3) Will you let me stay around you if I go and KILL Near with my bare hands?

4) Will you help me kill the potato-chip-lover Imagay?

5) Can I have a HUG, pretty please?

BLEH, YOU ARE HOT, AND I'M OUT, SEE YOU CHOCOLATE-SEX GOD!

-MXM's Holic

**MXM's Holic:**

**AH-HAHAHAHA couldn't have said it better myself! :D And yes, i do understand you. _Perfectly_...**

**1. haha may-be ;)  
**

**2. You're not the first...trust me.**

**3. HELL YES!**

**4. I would if that moron wasn't already dead...**

**5. Maybe...fine. *hugs***

**~MELLO**

* * *

did u know tht ur my 3rd favorite character? next to BB and...Near (i only  
like near cuz we r both albino

*takes his chocolate and runs (but not b4 getting a picture)*

-Beyond'sGurl

**Beyond'sGurl:**

**Um thank you I guess...*sigh* second again...**

**HEY GET BACK HERE WITH THAT! GODDAMMIT! grrrrrr...bitch... *hate*  
**

**~M**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Hi People! **

**I had a major Mello and Matt craze the other day...I went and looked up the two anime episodes that they (Mostly Mattie) are in and cried my head off when they died...I think I have issues...gah whatever... :D**

**Anyway...more questions...**

* * *

Whoo, HI!

Guuh, I have drink yesterday (Yaaay, New year and my head hurts  
badly...FUCK!)...XD

Ok, I have questions:

1- Do you have a good xmas? (I do xD)

2- What about new year?

3- In Death Note manga you can see Near eating a lot of chocolate, what do you  
think about it?

3- If you have to go anywhere, what country you pick?

4- Where are you from? (I wan't to know where do you have born!, Well, I have  
to say I'm from Chile :3 AND I LOVE IT!)

5- Do you eat anything else than chocolate?

6- Can you tell Matt that he is cute? (From part of me xDDD)

Ok, I'm gonna stop, it's enough xDDD

Ok, ok, bye Mello :D

-xXxLil'DarkxXx

**xXxLil'DarkxXx:**

**Haha hangover's are a bitch right?**

**1. It was okay...**

**2. Lotta alcohol...I'll say that much.**

**3. Damn copycat!**

**4. France (Don't tell anyone...)**

**5. Sure, chocolate is just the best.**

**6. Heh heh sure...**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Oh, Mello~ *glomp*

I love you! :DD

You remind me of BB at times. *smils* You know, your homicidal paranoid  
side... :3

eeeenyyyyywaaaaayssssss(anyways).

1. What are your thoughts on MelloxNear? (I kinda like it, but then again, I  
HATE Near!)

2. MattxMello is awesome, do you agree? :)

3. Here's Chocolate! :D *Throws you loans of chocolate* xDD

4. Near sucks Watari's ASSS!

5. I lurvvv youu... ;3

Bye!

*gloomp*

-xL-iz-After-BeyondBirthdayx

**xL-iz-After-BeyondBirthdayx:**

**Whoa! Space bubble here!**

**Okay. I've been compared to worse...**

**1. HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE...yeah you get the picture...**

**2. Yeah, pretty much.**

**3. Yummy! Wow...did I really just say that? **

**4. Yes! He does!**

**5. Okay. :D **

**~MELLO**

* * *

Ah. Makes sense.

...Really? Emotionless, blank, cold-hearted.

Awesome!

No, really! Its fun! ...Until you start to stink of copper.

No. It was a random song!

I thought we made you alive again? *resurrects you and Matt (who is nekkid,  
covered in chocolate)* ...How did that happen?

I scare myself...

LIGHT-BULB IMAGAAAAY! Why didn't you kill them?

Light: Because.

That's not an answer! *pout*

BYE BYE KICKASS AND BADASS! *poof*

-joy2theworlddannyphantom

**joy2theworlddannyphantom:**

***sees Matt* Well that was random...**

**Leave it to Wannabegod to give a stupid answer like that...**

**BYE!**

**~Mello**

* * *

Where you waiting for me to add a comment babe?

Ok, ok I'll stop playing Call Of Duty (just beacuse sex was fuckin  
mindblowing!)

Do you want me to pay more attention to you? *smirk*

Well, I KNOW this is damn awkward, but I'll ask anyways :3

1)Do you remember our first time? Was it really cause you were drunk or was it  
just an excuse to get into my pants?

2)Tell me you love me, cause I love you!

3)Do you prefer me to play Need For Speed or COD?

3)WHEN are you planning on letting me top you? Come on, you know you'll like  
it Mells! *puppy eyes* (you're right BTW, I've just realized that I AM fuckin  
femenine... gah whatever)

4)Wanna have sex again? I swear I'm gonna turn off my games at least for 2  
hours a day!

That's all I guess, I'll be waiting you in the bedroom :3

Matt

**Hey Mattie,**

**No I wasn't waiting...I wasn't aware that you read fanfiction actually...Isn't it mostly for teenage girls? **

**And yes I do want more attention...isn't it fucking obvious? Why do you think I shot your PlayStation?**

**1. Uhhh...Well *cough, awkward * ...Both?**

**2. Ugh I hate the mushy stuff...Fine...I love you...god...**

**3. Ha! Always right...Maybe later...In a million years...just kidin, tonight if you let me throw your game consul out the window...nah I wouldn't do that, you'd probably start bawling.  
**

**4. Hell Yes!**

**Halle-fucking-lujah!**

**See ya!**

* * *

GAWD thanx for the HUG!

1) Will you give me a kiss on the cheek if I tell you that I just burned  
Near's optimus prime and I made him cry? (cause I actually did)

2) You are TOO damn sexy! (That was not a question but whatever, I NEEDED to  
say it)

3) You know what?, we have something in common, cause a little albino brat  
beated me a couple of years ago AND I ENDED UP AS SECOND BEST, even though  
everybody KNEW that I was better than him... that takes me to a conclusion,  
they chose them as first places cause they felt sorry for them, not beacuse  
they are better than us... FUCKIN SICK PEOPLE, LETS FREAGGIN KILL THEM MELLO!  
(that wasn't a question either)

4) What is you favourite position in bed (=sex)?

5) Do you belive in that 2012 crap?

6) Do you like the movie Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? cause I had a HUGE  
crush on Willy Wonka...

Ok that's all, giiiive meee anotheeeer huuuug! *hands 1.2000 kilos of  
chocolate*

YOU ARE SEX ON LEGS BABE!

Kisses MXM's Holic

**MXM's Holic:**

**1. Hahahaha funniest damn story I've heard all day! Sure! *kisses***

**2. I know babe, I know...**

**3. Okays...*waits for real question***

**5. No, but it wasn't a bad movie.**

**6. Haha...Not really the little munchkin things annoy the fuck out of me.**

**Adios! Thank you!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

OMG MAAATTTT~ WAS HEERREE~ HIIII MATTTT...OH AND HI MELLO...sorry bout that  
ok down to the qustions ok 1. how old were you when you and matt first meet?  
2. how old were you when u had your first kiss. 3. how did u get so drop dead  
gorgeous? 4. kisses or M&M`s? Call Of Duty or final fantasy. ok thats alll  
for now byzzzzzz for now... *runs in to a medow of sunflowers...but then runs  
back snezzing because of alergys...run towards the sunset imstead *

chocolateisourlife

**chocolateisourlife:**

**Yeah, yeah...just Matt, get over it. ;)  
**

**We met when we were...eleven or twelve I guess**

**Thirteen...we were playing spin the bottle...**

***smirk* Natural Talent...**

**Kisses...more chocolate ;D**

**COD i guess...not really a big gamer...**

**Haha veerry niicee!**

**~MELLO**


	16. Chapter 16

**a/n new chapter...this will be the last thing I update for a little while...finals are coming! *sobs* so here ya go!**

* * *

  
Couldn't you just say that you were actually wating for me? I would have burnt  
COD! (ok, not) And I DON'T read fanfiction, I just read this 'thing' cause YOU  
are the one answering the cuestions... but yeah, I read some MXM's I have to  
admit it, and they gave me some ideas *smirk*

You SHOT my PlayStation... Man, I thought you loved me! (drama-queen Matt) Ok,  
I'll pay MORE attention to you *gives box full of chocolates*

Now my questions (I coul ask you personally, but this is so damn fun)

1. Wow, both? I feel flattered.

2. Are you going to hit me latter if I say hi to a random fangirl? (I'll do it  
anyways *masochist*) Hi there 'chocolateisourlife' *winks*.

3. Did you broke my Nintendo last year? (I mean a couple of days ago.)

4. WHY!

OH, I'll let you trhow my game console out the window if you let me top you  
tonight... just because I know I can hack a new one :D

5. Would you let me top you at least once a week if I turn off my games for at  
least four hours (THAT is fuckin suicidal)?

6. Did you saw my goggles? I just can't freaggin find them!

Ok... I'll meet you in the shower (?) *smirk*

-Matt

**Hey Mattie Boy,**

**Ooh ideas? Now I'm interested. *wink***

**Thank you for the chocolate. And it was just so much fun to shoot! I couldn't resist...The little splutter as the power went out...ahhhh**

**1. Mmmmm what's with people and numbering random thoughts as questions...**

**2. Friggin tease...oh look she fainted...**

**3. Maybe...what's it to you?**

**4. Fine!**

**5. We'll talk about that one later...**

**Oh HELL YES!**

**~Mello**

* * *

  
(Flurp, please lemme try this again. I accidntallysent it .)

Hello Mello! It has always amused me how that rhymes XD. Anyway, I must admit  
that I am a Near fangirl. WAIT DON'T SHOOT. Or hate me. This works out  
nicely,because I also adore MxM. SO, I remove Near from your life and you gets  
Matt. :3 Questions!

1) isn't it fun to dress totally badass? *dawns leather jacket and boots with  
black skinnies that don't make her look like a wanna be but actually awesome*

2) what do you think of the way Matt dresses? *puts on striped shirt and blue  
skinny jeans and takes out DS* I like cosplaying so I might do this. XP

3) random not-a-question I like FMA too :3

Um, that's all I got for now. Everyone seems to ask for a hug at the end,  
sooooooooo...

...

... instead, I'm going to ask you to hug my totally badass blond best friend  
who is obsessed with you even though she hasn't even read Death Note. :D

Aaaand... chocolate! *white cotton longsleeve tee and baggy jeans as she  
rummages through a HUGE mound of candy...* Aha! Okay, I have Girradelli (I  
can't even hope to spell that right) Hershey's, and a Wonka waterfall bar.  
Where did that even come from? Anywho, I want some, too,so pick one :3 *holds  
out bars of chocolate*

-TacoSandwich

**TacoSandwich:**

***pulls out gun* oh, awww man...That actually makes a sick kind of sense...Fine. Go ahead and take the little freak.**

**1. Hellz yes. *points to totally sexy leather outfit***

**2. Half punk/half gay...**

**3. mmmkay**

**Fine...*hugs random blonde chick***

**Ahhhh a girl L! Thanks for the chocolate!**

**~MELLO**

* * *

  
Ok, xD

About the last...questions session xD?

YES!, the hangover is a bitch (Like a stupid albino I know...XD)

Well, more questions *put a lot of papers on a table...(What fucking  
table?...Ok, now I have a table :3)*

1- Near is officially alive in Death Note...I wan't you to kill him!...Can you  
KILL HIM?, PLEASE? (Suck it, Near!)

2- Do you know that Kiyomi Takada kills you? (She is a slut, like that blonde  
asshole...Misa, but, they both die!, KYAHAHAHAHA!...Or, I think so xD)

3- Why you are SO AWESOME/HOT/CUTE/COOL? (X3, I LOVE YOUU!)

4- Happy 2011! du'h xDDDD (No question here xD)

5- Matt x Mello is my favorite Death Note couple, it's cutee!, what do you  
think about it?

Ok, too much crap for a day xD

But, I'm gonna comeback!

You are warned (?)...FAIL!

Ok, BYE! :3

-xXxLil'DarkxXx

**xXxLil'DarkxXx:**

**Haha yes...okay shoot...**

**1. Been trying to kill the dumb bastard for years...**

**2. I laughed my friggin head off when that slut died. (Yeah I really don't care if I was already dead. I'm magic. Suck it!)**

**3. Natrual talent...**

**4. Same back at ya'**

**5. Hot as Hell!**

***sigh* looking forward to it... *eye twitch***

**~Mello**

* * *

  
OH WOW COOOOL! I luffles these things. ERM. GAH. LET ME THINK I IZ BRAINDEAD!  
OH YES!

1)Vanilla or Chocolate? CHOCOLATE ALL TEH WAY!

2)Okay, Mello. We all know your mean and all but honestly, between you and  
Matt. SEME OR UKE? :o

3)Want to kill Takada with me?

P.S: I thought you were awesome. :D I WAAAAANT TO MEET YOU! I have pictures of  
you hung up on my wall, just like every teenage girl does. OwO

-ICanHazCheeseBurgerRawr

**ICanHazCheeseBurgerRawr:**

**1. Okay...you answered your own question for me but yes. Chocolate all the way!**

**2. seme...*sigh* fangurls have one-track minds...**

**3. Hell yes! *stands up* lets go!**

**Mmmm fascinating...**

**~mello**

* * *

  
Ok im back..

Hows everything?

I had a very shitty new years!

ok on with the qustions...

1. why did you grow your hair out.

2. I read in the other chapter that matt was the uke...that just seem right,  
matt should be the seme.

3. i heard you were a good detective and you help the other person find their  
pizza..Well i need help finding my pencel.i threw it in the air and it never  
came back down.. I am perperd to give you 25 - 50 chocolate bars is you find  
it befor my test on friday.

4. everyone elce got a hug and now i want one. So can i have a hug  
pleezz.{pulls two chocolate bars from bag}

5. did you name your gun if so what did you name it.

6. hahaha i finialy beat COD: black opps.. take that matt.

7. Whats the biggest prank you ever pulled on someone. was it a success

well ok thats all c-ya

*walks away into the distance*

hinadear08

**hinadear08**

**Pretty good thanks...Mmmm me too...**

**1. Cause it's sexy... you disagree?**

**2. Sorry...**

**3. It's obviously stuck in the ceiling.**

**4. Yes. *hugs quickly and releases***

**5. Ellie...it was my moms name :'(**

**6. He told me to tell you that he beat it first.**

**7. Oh heck yes it was! I managed to die Nears hair hot pink! It didn't wash out for a week! *dies of laughter***

**Good bye,**

**~Mello**

* * *

  
OMGOSH MATT JUST WINKED AT ME...*nosebleed*faints*...ok im up ummm sorry bout  
that so yeah hiiiiiii mello im back with another german dubble chocolate chip  
cake*hope u like it and forgive me for what just happen T~T* OK sooooos heres  
my qustions 1. do u have a teddy bear?... you woke up one day and all of  
your hair was gone what would you do?... all the chocolate in the world  
was some how destoryed and you counded make any what would you do? ...welll  
thats all byzzzzzzzzz*runs into a door that says pull...gets upp brushes off  
and goes in waving byzzz*  
-chocolateisourlife

**chocolateisourlife:**

**Aaannnd shes on the floor...Matt, you bloody tease...*grrrr***

**Mmmm thanks!**

**1. no!**

**2. Shoot the motherfucker who shaved it off!**

**3. Die?**

***sigh* not again...**

**~Mello**

* * *

**Questions?**


	17. Chapter 17

**a/n. Hey people...yeah this one took a while...I've been trying to work on other stories plus I've had finals (which totally suck!) anyway...here you go. :D**

Hello again :D

I must ask...

1. What do you think about all this NearXMello fanfictions,fanart and  
fangirls?

you ever been in love? If so who?

-mistyskiies

**mistyskiies:**

**1. Annoying as hell and completely untrue...**

**2. I don't know for sure...**

**~Mello**

* * *

Hello Mello.

Let's see, you would be my second favorite character? Yeah. Cause L is my  
first. Sorry, we met him first. Don't worry though... Near is somewhere below  
Matsuda and above Light.

1. So, i'm new here so can I have a welcom hug? Pretty pretty please?

2. And can I hug Matty too? He's so cute... *hugs anyway*

3. Did you know there is a drink called Mello Yello? O.O

4. Do you like panda bears?

5. Why did people ask you about whether you liked *whispers* unicorns *stops  
whispering* so much?

6. It's ironic that you like pheonix's. My friend and I were having a  
conversation about what animal you were and i said you were a pheonix because  
"Pheonix's get reborn and shit from fire and after the explosion Mello seemed  
a hell of a lot more badass and less insane" Let's face it, that scar made you  
seem SOOO much less girly.

7. Can you kidnap me?

8. Can you tell my friend that you top, not matt? she seems to be convinced to  
the other one...

9. Funny story... So last year on a snow day i was bored so I cut my hair and  
it came out looking just like yours (im blonde) except i hadn't read death  
note yet. This made me very confused as to why my friend (same one) was  
cracking up so hard

10. Yes, we will keep labling random thoughts as questions.

11. Does it annoy you that near plusies exist but there are no Mello ones?

12. Am i the most sane fangirl youve seen?

Um, im done. With questions. I have to tell you that i'm tired... otherwise  
I'd be more hyper. Next time i promise to be insane. Promise.  
-insanepersonishappy

**insanepersonishappy:**

**Haha, At least I'm above imagay...**

**Um...sure I guess. *hugs***

**2. Grrrrrrr**

**3. I didn't actually, but that's cool!**

**. **

**5. Beacuse they are crazy, irritating, insane teenage girls and their minds work in strange ways.**

**6. I agree, it is pretty badass.**

**7. *Sigh* Why the fuck do you all want that? That Sayu chick didn't seem to love it that much...**

**8. Ok. **

**9. Haha, that's amazing.**

**10. *taps fingers against table***

**11. Not really, the idea of a little doll that looks like me sounds really gay. A.k.a perfect for Near. ;)**

**12. Hmm actaully you are...and here I thought they didn't exist...**

**J-o-y...**

**~MELLO**

* * *

1. What is up with the whole *nose bleeds* thing ive googled it Everywear and  
cant find a refrance!

2. How are you so damn sexy if you eat chocolate all the time? Is it like your  
sexy food?

much chocolate do you eat a day? (i eat atleast 5 bars of the big kind  
err' day...beat that)-no joke

4. Your BFF matt is such a sexy beast tell him that for me ;D

5. I personally think you look nothing like a girl but...why the midriff  
top's?

7. If i was about to get mugged whould you save me?

8. Would YOU be the mugger?

9. Can you please hold me hostage?

10. Can i hold you hostage?

11. Home work question: how do you determine the charge on an ion?

Olive youuuu mello! And matt! Sexy beasts!  
- jelly-bae

**jelly-bae:**

**I actually have no idea...presumably another ridiculous aspect of being a teenage girl is that your nose bleeds when you get turned on...go fucking figure.**

**Yep!**

**Probably about 8 or 9...give or take a couple. (Call me fat-ass and I shoot you. kthxhaveagreatday.)**

**Okay...**

***smirks* Cause I have sexy abs and aren't afraid of showin 'em to the world...**

**Maybe...**

**Probably...**

**One track mind...that's all I have to say.**

**You can try and see how far that gets you. ;)**

**Find the difference between the number of protons and electrons..if there are more electrons then the ion is negative and vice versa...and next time do your own damn work!**

**Bye!**

**~Mello**

* * *

*chuckles* So this is what Mello does on his day of huh? I wouldn't have  
expected that.

Before you ask, a couple of fangirls sent me this and asked me to do my own  
(which I'm not) so my first question is... why are you caving in to the fans?  
It is truly amazing how determined you are but you can't seem to stay away  
from the spotlight, which will cause you downfall.

I also see that I am a big topic here. It makes me worry about you.

In case you didn't know, yaoi triggers the fanbase to completelygo crazy, so  
if I were you, I wouldn't brag to your fans about your "Mattie"

Speaking of which, I kidnapped Matt.

I'll be awaiting your reply

-N  
**Freak:**

**FUCK. YOU. Why don't you go jump of a fucking cliff you little bastard! God I hate you so motherfucking much!**

**First of all, at least I can get attention. (Who'd wanna give YOU any!) And second of all, screw you! **

**Yeah, I don't really give a shit what you or they think so go burn in hell albino fag.**

**And third of all, GIVE MATT BACK YOU LITTLE MOTHERFUCKER!**

**I hope Kira fucking kills you!**

**~M (it looks sexier when I do it...)**

* * *

'tforgottennonono...Okay, it is.

D:

I want to tell you something.

Can you handle it?

Yes, I think you can. You are a big kid now. I. Don't. Like. Light.

No really, as shocking as it seems, I don't like him.

I threw a remote at my mother for confusing Light with L. -sniffles- She will  
never understand.

She also didn't get the you blowing up the building thing. Not only that but  
she seems to think that Near is better than L. Near was brilliant, I will  
admit, but I still think that if you hadn't been so reckless, he wouldn't have  
had a single clue as to what to do. And he admitted it. Light and his  
innocentbutgodeyes pisses me off.

Onto happier things, tell Matt I said 'ello. And that Black Ops is the best  
game evar. Also, has he ever played SSBM? Or SSBB? Those are good games. I was  
talking about Matt with my friend and I mentioned his untimely, unfair end,  
and she burst into tears and hit me. Really hard. How cruel. D:

Can I name my pet monkey after you?

Or maybe I will play pokemon and get a jiggle-puff and name it after you...

Well, I gotta go walk my dog. Keep it real homedawg. AlsoIdon'.?  
- xXForgottenxXxPrincessXx

**xXForgottenxXxPrincessXx:**

**Really not all that impressive actually. Most people don't seeing as he killed L, one of the most popular people. And this includes me. Personally I think he's a stupid, wanna-be, justinbeiberlookalike, gay, poser...But hey, thats just me... ;)**

**And no, your mother never will...You also might want her to get her eyes checked out...**

**Near will never come fucking close to equaling L. Nuff said.**

**Matt says hi, and said yes he had, and beat them.**

**Haha sure, whatever.**

**~Mello**

* * *

If anyones a bitch its you! Still love ya tho!  
-Beyond'sGurl

**Beyond'sGurl: **

**Um...thanks I guess.**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Eeeek! I still really love asking you guise questions. Mk. SO MY LUFFLE  
BUDDEHS! LEEEET ME ASK SOME QUESTIONS, OR ELSE THIS CHOCOLATE MAY BE FIND UP  
YOUR A- Okay, let's not go there. :D

1)Have you ever gotten drunk, and if so what was the most hottest thing you  
did to Matt? ~.~

2)I liek your hair, I shall bow down to the great powers of Mello. Even though  
I own liek, a thousand of your plushies.

3)Would you have fallen for Near if he was a girl?

4)I hate NearxMello, rejoice? :D

5)Sometimes, when I watch your scenes, I really feel the urge to take a  
chocolate bar, and eat it. 3  
-ICanHazCheeseBurgerRawr

ICanHazCheeseBurgerRawr:

Wow, so you're harassing other people as well...Please tell me Near's on that list...

1. Meh...

2. Hmmm...lovely...

3. Um let me think for a second...no! Not a chance in heaven, hell, or anywhere else in this whole fucking universe! Thanks for asking tho...

4. Gracias

5. HAHAHAHA YES!

~MLEOL (sorry I have dyslexia ;D )

* * *

Meelllloooo immm backkkk and i got more chocolate*signals people to bring  
chocolate* i got nine boxes for you hows that...ok heres my qustions...  
near wasent albino would you like him more?...2.^f near wasent albino he wound  
be a sheep anymore so what would you call him...hmmmm i dont really have that  
many qustions this time that sucks...welll ill talk to you later...oh wait iv  
never told you that your my fav charter in death note because your so badass  
and i love your scar and your soooo hott and matt is my 2nd fav because hes  
also badass and cute and i love his hair...so yeah byzzzzzz*runs away waveing  
back at you and hits a pole but yelllsss "Im ok, byzzzzz"*

- chocolateisourlife

**chocolateisourlife:**

**Yay...I almost missed you and then realized how nice and quiet it was without you...**

**Awesome...**

**Nope, his looks have absolutely nothing to do with it. **

**Moron? Loser? Retard? Fag? Useless? Dickhead? Asshole? Twilight lover? Emotionless, whiny, irritating, stuck up, little child? All of the above?**

**If you were any more clumsy you might as well be that pissy little chick from Twilight...**

**~Mello**

* * *

ok. i has more qs for mells! oh and did u look up number ten in the  
confessions of georgia nicolson for refrence?

1. do you think matt would like my harry potter games?

2. would you ever shop at ayame sohma's costume shop? see fruits basket

3. have you ever heard of a band called jack off jill?

4. do you think the song video kid by the birthday massacre represents matt  
really well?

5. wat do you think of strawberry jam?

6. will you ever let matt top?

bye!  
- Chaos

**Chaos:**

**Yep.**

**Probably...I think he has one...**

**No. I refuse to see fruits basket or anything to do with fruits basket...**

**Yeah...They're a little goth for me but their not too bad...**

**Wow. It actually does. Haha awesome!**

***shiver* Reminds me of Beyond...**

***Sigh* Maybe tonight if you guys will SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT IT!**

**Whew, calm now. :)**

**~MELLO**

* * *

Hello again.

Everyone always gives you chocolate but i keep fogetting soo i broght a boat  
load for you enjoy.

Im so board out of my mind. We got snowed in and every thing is closed down so  
i cant go anywhere and cant do any thing.

Yeah so back on subject...

1. What do you do when you get board?

2. what does this look like .../\...\0/...?

3. Why do you talorate these fan girls?

4. Where does all that chocolate go?

5. Im still verry board.

6. Im gonna go shot people. Wanna join?

7. Whats your favorite type of gun?

8. Willy wonka wonts his factory back...and the key...but shoot the umpalumpas  
plezz.

Well bye for now...hold on a min..*steals a chocolate bar then runs*haha

-hinadear08

**hinadear08:**

**Thanks!**

**Ouch, that burns...**

**Blow shit up...it's really fun. You should try it sometime...**

**Punctuation Marks? I give up...**

**Meh...they give me chocolate and something to do...**

**I don't know...do I look like a doctor to you? **

***sad face***

**Hellz Yeah! Less go!**

**a semi-automatic pistol. :D**

**Thank you! and those little blue people bug the hell out of me! *guns 'em all down* There we go...**

**Hey! Come back here! grrrr...**

**~MeLlo**


	18. Chapter 18

**Hi people! I realized I forgot about this story-type thing… anyway...i've been incredibly busy lately and am also working really hard on a harry potter fic so this may or may not be updated for a while... :D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Mello *pouts***

* * *

Omg hiii mellloooo guessss wat i grew 1 inch taller..yay. i ate 10 cookies today to so im kinda hyper..yay. happy happy joy joy. ok now your qustions...yay. ok ummm your last reply to my qustions u said it was quiet without me so im gonna say{yells sacastily}IM NOT A LOUD PERSON AM I...2. eww why is near here{runs around yellin ewww but trips and sits down}...3. i forgot to mention that i love your leather... u want 10 dubble chocolate chip cookies diped in more chocolate...5. happy happy joy joy...6. how would u feel is a rain cloud folled you every where... u like rainy days... makes u really hyper...9.i have a bear that looks like near it has big eyes and no smil and its bleach white. it scares me...well ok byezzzzz{walks out the door and sees a trail of huny and follows then finds a bee hive...pokes bee hive with a stick and gets chased by bees...trips and falls and get attacted by bees...gets up aand yells"im stillll ok byezzzzzzz"}

-chocolateisourlife

**chocolateisourlife:**

**1. Sorry...you are the epitome of quiet *rolls eyes***

**2. ...**

**3. Heck yeah!**

**4. You forgot four...go back to pre-school and learn to count...**

**5. You annoy me.**

**6. I'm kind of used to it... I grew up in England after all.**

**7. You really have-**

**8. an inability to count, don't you?**

**9. I would be too...**

**Haha smooooth... XD**

**-Mello out-  
**

* * *

HIIIIII! Matsuda here XD I was looking thru fanfiction for a yaoi but I guess this will do, I've all ready read all the yaois for Deathnote, FMA and Bleach, they were all very good, espesialy the lemons XD Don't tell Near this but I don't trust him *Shifty eyes*

QUESTION TIME!

1. I believe that Near used the death note to kill you, do you agree with my theory

2. Why do you like chocolate so much

3. .com/watch?v=k34xvLCcxDo HAHAHAHAHA!

BYE!

-Matsuda XD

**Matsuda: **

**You're the one from the task force correct? Near mentioned you... That's a bit disturbing that you read yaoi though... Isn't that targeted towards teenage girls?**

**I don't trust Near either...we can agree on that much.**

**1. No. Near didn't kill me...I'd like to see him try though... *cough* _and fail_ *cough cough***

**2. It tastes good. Why do you like Light?**

**3. Interesting... Again disturbing that you were watching it though...**

**-Mello out-**

* * *

BAHAHAHAHAH IM BACK! AND IM NOT TIRED THIS TIME SO I SHALL BE AS INSANE AS I WANT TO BE! MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH

1. *glomps matty. again. just because*

2. *Gives chocolate to appease (possibly) angry mello*

3. OH MY GOD ITS A UNICORN RUN!

4. *shoots unicorn*

5. Why the hell am i numbering these?

6. I hate mormons... cause they spawned stephenie meyer. actually, i don't hate mormons (orson scott card is one plus i dont want to offend people... =_=) i just hate stephenie meyer. alot. yah.

7. I bet Near is a scientoligist

8. Scientology is weird.

9. Do you like Moxart?

10. Have you ever watched the movie Amadeus?

11. Do you think I'm insane yet?

HERE! MORE CHOCOLATE! *grabs matt* BAI! *runs away, still dragging matt*

insanepersonishappy

**insanepersonishappy:**

**Dear god...if I wasn't already dead then brought back to life, I would say kill me...**

**1. *shoots person* again...just because...**

**2. *scowl* Apology accepted... *eats chocolate***

**3. Yes! She's gone... (going out on a limb here and assuming you're a girl) oh damn! shes back...**

**4. Thank you.**

**5. I really have no idea.**

**6. I do as well...she is a terrible author and spawned one of THE most annoying populations of fangirls ever seen.**

**7. I just looked that up... Rather creepy.**

**8. Yes... very much so.**

**9. I'm assuming you mean Mozart? He is a very boring musician...Talented yes, but his music makes you want to shoot something...**

**10. Nope, heard it was good though.**

**11. YES! now leave!**

***mutters* Jesus Christ...quit stealing Matt...**

**-Mello out-**

* * *

oh i forgot to ask you to tell matt that i found his goggles. bye!

-chaos

**chaos: **

**He said thank you.**

**-Mello out-**

* * *

hey mello yello if i may

i dont hate u but i dont lyk u i lyk near～kun but i wont tell near that i talked 2 u..;)

anyway on with my questions..

1. why do u hate near and insult him and beat him up?

give u chocolate from PERU if u say this to near(btw peruvian chocolate is the best chocolate in the world:D) i mello will admit that you are better than me and matt wants to make love with you. MUHAHAHA IM INSANE LYK KIRA TO BAD I DONT HAVE A DEATH NOTE. plus while saying this i want you to wear a black lolita dress and sing baby by justin beiber. if u dont do this i will kidnap matt and steall ur gun and chocolate.

3. if near was 50feet tall what would you do

im done toruteing u so bye mello yello *runs up and gives mello a hug and chocolate (the shitty kind)* hey i can be nice to u dont shoot me though or else bye w

-just2boredlazy2loginP

**just2boredlazy2loginP:**

**Grrrr... fine. Your life.**

**1. Because he's an idiot and it's fun!**

**I REFUSE! I may like chocolate but I still have my pride...Male honor and all that shit...**

**3. Get a pair of stilts.**

**Meh. *takes a bite of crappy chocolate and spits it out***

**-Mello out-**

* * *

Nice to see you again, Mello. I have to say, for as badass as you seemed to be convinced that you are, this strays quite a bit from your "image". However it is not surprising. Being on , posting replies to crazy fangirls, bragging about yourself when in reality you've gained 25 pounds (the chocolate's caught up with you, I see *chuckle*), Matt has ended your relationship to come work for me (place special emphasis on "come" and "for me"), and your once golden hair is now gone due to premature balding,, is quite indicative of a low self-esteem (which I've always known you've had due to your pointless competing with me). Really, I'm only here to ask you one thing. Did you know Matt likes to have his partner top? I never did but I can now say I have plently of "expierience" to prove it. By the way, Matt hates you as do I. Also, you and L are both dumbasses, especially you.

~~~N~~~

**N:**

**You suck. End of story. And Matt will NEVER love you. Also any 'experience' you've had was probably online porn. I fucking hate you. **

**-M OUT-**

* * *

Hello, Mello *tee hee- it rhymes* I just want to say, I F*CKING LOVE YOU, YOU SEXY B*TCH, YOU! Howver, despite this painfully obvious fact (your face is on my toilet paper- 'nuff said), you are still allowed to stay with Matt as long as I get to read about you doing sexy things to Matt (*wiggles eyebrows*).

Anyway, here are my questions. By the way, I refrained from reading all seventeen chapters of this so I apologize beforehand, in the case that I may repeat a question.

1.) If Light Yagami (whom I hate with a passion as he killed almost all my favorite characters, and before you shoot someone, yes, you are in the number one spot, though you are tied with L and Matt) offered to let you screw his brains out and you did not know of his identity with Kira and were not in your lovely yaoi relationship with Matt, would you accept?

2. Which fanfiction pairing disturbs you the most: L x Mello, Light x Mello, Sidoh x Mello or Female Mary Sue OC? (I'm going to have a spurt of possible intelligence and avoid putting Near x Mello on the list)

3. Based solely on appearance, would you ever screw Near?

4. Were you ever sexually attracted to L in any way?

5. Have you ever told Matt the extent your true feelings about him or is it silently known between you two without words, or neither?

6. Why do you have such a leather fetish?

Thank you for your cooperation. Ta-ta for now!

-WaterFireEarthAirChocolate

**WaterFireEarthAirChocolate:**

**OhDearGod... I'm scared now... Do they even sell toilet paper like that?**

**Meh. 's all right...**

**1. No! His hair looks like Justin Beiber's and even if he wasn't Kira he'd still be a dumb poser.**

**2. Sidoh x Me *shudders* Because as much as Light sucks and Mary-Sues annoy the hell out of me, at least they're _human_!**

**3. NO! Little albino rat...**

**4. Nope...he's at least ten years older than me. Plus I only met him face to face once.**

**5. Silently known I guess...**

**6. 'Cause it looks cool. And I wouldn't say _fetish_...**

**Bye.**

**-Mello out-**


	19. Chapter 19

**a/n Hey! 's been a while... I'll turn it over to Mello now ;D**

* * *

MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! I AM A GIRL! GOOD JOB! And im also not as hyper today. And  
yes i did mean Mozart. i hate typos.

1. I'm sorry for stealing matt. *gives matt back* Here have some more  
chocolate

2. I apologize for the insaneness of the last review.

3. No, i do not have multiple personality disorcer.

4. ...

5. WHY IS THERE A FREAKING UNICORN FOLLOWING ME AROUND! MELLO SHOOT IT!

6. Is it gone?

7. If it is... *gives a bunch of chocolate*

8. HAPPY VALENTINES DAY MELS!  
-insanepersonishappy

**insanepersonishappy:**

**Hey...again...**

***takes Matt* Thank you very much... ¬_¬**

**2. *sigh* It's all right, I'm slowly getting used to you people...emphasis on SLOWLY  
**

**3. Okay...Not that I was wondering or anything...**

**4. ... *sigh***

**5. GAH! *pulls out gun* BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM...there you go...oh shit...I think that used to be a building...whoops!**

**6. Oh, yes...**

**7. Thanks!**

**8. Meh. Worthless holiday. Lotta chocolate though...**

**~Mello out~**

* * *

Yaoi is targeted towards teenage girls? Are you sure? I like Light cause I'm  
idiotic and immature and I don't know how to tell the difference between a  
monster and a hero, that's what Aizawa is always telling me :)

**Matsuda:**

**Yes, yes it is... And you should really listen to Aizawa more when it comes to the Light issue. **

**~Mello Out~**

* * *

Hi, Mello!

First off, I think you're awesome. You remind me of my best friend. (She's  
blonde, and she has a bad temper too.)

Now...hmm...Questions:

1. Would you rather watch Matt get stabbed to death (and have it be YOUR  
fault)...or go the rest of your life without chocolate and be forced to serve  
Near as a slave?

2. Do you think that L would like me? We have a lot in common.

3. How do you restrain yourself from killing Near? I imagine it's very  
difficult.

4. Are your pants uncomfortable?

5. Could I try them on?

6. What's your favorite thing to eat (other than chocolate)?

7. If I kidnapped you, Matt, and L (but treated you all very nicely by giving  
you chocolate, video games, and cake, and helped you catch Light) would you  
hate me and try to leave? Cause I may try that someti - never mind.

But seriously, would you?

Okay, I'm done. *Squeals like a fangirl.*

I love you!

*Hands chocolate from my secret stash.*  
-StrawberrySky11

**StrawberrySky11:**

**How lovely, your friend sounds amazing.**

**1. O.o Damn, that's a shitty decision to have to make! Um... Having Matt die and been my fault was bad enough once... I don't think I could go through that again.**

**2. Probably not, there are very few people that L likes.**

**3. It is very, very hard. I just imagine him painfully dying/ turn my music up reeaally loud...**

**4. Nope.**

**5. Um sure...if I can get them off... :(**

**6. Sour gummy worms.**

**7. I would only hate you minorly if you gave me enough chocolate. ;)**

**Please don't though. I have a gun...**

**~Mello Out~**

* * *

From: L ()

hey~

i dont have much to say anyway so i'll just get to my questions~

1. if near was stalking you, what would you do?

2. if kira succeded in killing near, what would you do afterwards?

3. if B-san was stalking you...?(you know the rest)

4. do you go to any anime conventions?

5. out of all the FEMALE anime characters that exist, who would you crossplay  
as and why?

i'll be back whenever

~L

**L: **

**Really? You read fanfiction? Facinating... Not in a bad way though!**

**1. Be seriously creeped out and then probably threaten him...**

**2. Laugh.**

**3. Ruunnnnnn!**

**4. Oh hell no! There is no place where more insane people gather together than anime conventions.**

**5. Misa Amane... She has great fashion sense.**

**Bye L, **

**Mello.**

* * *

Hi there :D

I was just feeling like asking stupid and random things so here I am. IDK if  
there's something you've already answer. I'm lazy to see other chapters.

SO first: Happy valentine's Day. Don't know why is happy besides chocolate and  
damn I can't eat chocolate D: I'm in a freakin' diet! So there you can have  
all the chocolate I got today T-T

1.-MUST ASK! Are you seme or uke? xD just kidding you're totally seme...aren't  
you?

2.-What's the most ridiculous thing you've ever done?

3.-Have ever anyone confused you with a corner whore? Did they put you in  
jail?

4.-Er..what would be your reaction if someone decide that chocolate was  
dangerous or some crap like that and stop making them and there where no more  
chocolate in the world, NOT even illegal?

5.-Now plus that what if Near won some prize at "most sexy, intelligent,  
BLOND, mafia leader, non-gay, best detective guy in the world...no, in the  
universe!" ?

6.-AND! What if I told you all this time Matt though you were a [hot] girl?

7.-Already freak out much?

8.- Add to that what if I told you I know where do you live and me and Near  
are planning kidnapping you.

9.-er...something else. What do you think about Matt's awful death. (I mean  
all the thing "you won't sho-" *everyone shoots*)

10.- And...er...if you were about to die and to save your ass you have two  
options: 1. Have sex with Near. 2. Being his slave for er...a week. :D what  
would you choose? (And no! you can't kill yourself or choose other thing or  
don't choose nothing. Just this two.)

I guess that's enough pain for you today.

Totally luv ya! :D you're my fav character. (Yeah, imagine what can I do to  
people I don't like xD)

-lil-blue-tiger

**Lil blue tiger:**

**Thanks! *eats chocolate* Yeah, thats pretty much the only good thing about an otherwise useless holiday.**

**1. Yes.**

**2. Superglued Matt's DS to the floor and then laughed my ass off for about an hour while he tried to pick it up... Good times...good times...**

**3. I refuse to answer this question... *sigh* ...Maybe... :/  
**

**4. There will always be illegal things... It will become a new drug!**

**5. How the hell would he win that? I think I'd blow up a fucking building!**

**6. Hiss...**

**7. *wordless scream***

**8. *covers ears* I CAN'T HEAR YOU!**

**9. Sucked majorly...but in retrospect it was probably one of the most ironic ways to die imaginable.**

**10. Damn! Sex I guess...being his slave would suck so bad!**

**Oh jesus! I can't even imagine...**

**~Mello Out~**


	20. Chapter 20

**a/n Hey guys! Sorry that this took FOREVER to update. I know it did... Been working on some other stories alot but I'll try to update this again asap...**

* * *

YOU LAIR! You're the uke and you know it! How dare you lie to a fangirl, no  
chocolate for you!

-Matsuda!

**Matsuda:**

**You are a complete idiot...you do know that right?**

**A key factor about fangirls is...they are GIRLS! And unless you got a sex change since I last saw you (which would not particularly surprise me in the slightest) YOU ARE NOT A FANGIRL.**

**Get out of my life x_x**

**especially my sex life!  
**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

Hello Mello. It's Beyond and I'm baaaack from the dead, Kuhahaha.

If you answer my questions, I'll give you a chocolate gun. A gun made of  
chocolate, not one that shoots chocolate, that'd be weird.

1. How are you and Matt doing?

2. Do your fangirls scare you?

3. Do you know that you are more like me then are you like L?

4. Could you get me some more jam?

5. Could you give me L's new address? p.s I know where you and Matt live.

6. If Matt was being held hostage by an insane ex-wammy killer, who would kill  
Matt unless you kill L, what would you do?

That's all for now, got to get some more jam, so have a kit kat.

Love Beyond Birthday.

**Beyond:**

**Ohmygod. I thought we got rid of you when you ran away... Dammit. Just kiddin' dude.  
**

**And actually a gun that shoots chocolate would be really sick.**

**1. We're fine.**

**2. Not as much as yours do...seriously, what kind of sick girl falls for a mass murderer? (especially you) I mean _seriously_? It's horribly disturbing!  
**

**3. Rawr...**

**4. No, that's what your silly little fangirl slaves are for.**

**5. No...I really don't think that's a good idea...and stay AWAY from our house you creeper!  
**

**6. Hmm kill someone I respect but don't personally care about or let Matt die because of me _again_... *sarcasm***

***snaps kit kat bar*  
**

**See ya' dude.**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

... Mello? I... I can ask you questions...

*resisting fangirl urges*

Okay! Question 1!

1. How did you spend Valentines day with Mattie? ... Can I have a tape?  
(Kidding... though it would be nice!)

2. Have you ever seen a horror movie? Did you LIKE it?

3. What do you like best about Matt? Spare NO details!

4. Is there anywhere in the world you've ALWAYS wanted to go to?

5. How fast are you?

6. Why do you keep your gun in the front of your pants? ... Can I touch it? -  
Uh, um... I didn't say that *blushes*

7. Cars or motorcycles?

8. Can I hug you for not glomping you like I wanted to?

9. You surpass Near on my favourites list! How does this make you feel?

Okay, I resisted my fangirl instincts... for the most part! Now take this  
chocolate! Bye bye! *hugs shyly*

P.s.

Your leather is so SHINEY!

skylarkz

**skylarkz:**

**Well, hello there.**

**1. I ate chocolate and...um...hung out... with Matt. *blush***

**2. Many times! And hell ya'! Who doesn't like horror movies?**

**3. Ugh... I hate romancy questions... Um. He's cute I guess, and sweet, and funny...and... cute. OKAY THATS ALL YOU'RE GETTING! BYE!**

**4. Fiji! or the Galapagos Islands.**

**5. Ummm...at what...? **

**6. *smirk* **

**7. Motorcycles **

**8. Sure, *hugs* Happy now?**

**9. Like I succeeded for once in my miserable life... just kidding. Emo moment over... Actually it makes me like you about 3.78% more.**

**Resisting those urges is ALWAYS a good thing! Thank you! *eats chocolate* **

***smirk* thanks.**

**Adios**

**-Mello out-**

* * *

Mello? I haz questions. :D

So... *takes a bite out of large chocolate bar* do you want some chocolate?  
Here ya go, anyway. *hands Mello a chocolate bar*

1) I don't view white chocolate as real chocolate. It only uses cocoa butter  
and tastes revolting. Do you think it's real chocolate?

2) Near is an idiot. Just sayin' that. xD He eats his toys, which were most  
likely made in China so they have lead paint. xD

3) Any tips on being better than the one that everyone considers "Number one"?  
Everyone thinks I'm second best... D:

Think that's all for now... I'll send more chocolate, don't worry. ;D

-CanDoAnythingNow

**CanDoAnythingNow :**

**Yes, oh thanks. *eats chocolate***

**1. No, it's nasty stuff. Too sweet. Milk is the best then dark chocolate... Wait, wait, wait hold on! Swiss chocolate is the fucking best!**

**2. That would actually explain a lot about the little freak...**

**3. Keep freaking trying no matter how many times you fail, what people say, or how much of your face you blow off... Seriously though, it's the only way. Haha good luck!**

**Lookin' forward to it. (maybe)**

**-Mello out-**

* * *

ok-im baack!

1. did you know that my best friend who is ubsessed wif near *steals gun and  
shoots it at him* and edward cullen *tears to shreads and burns* looks JUST  
like you and roleplays you? (btw, i roleplay matt. unforch, she say eww or  
pulls my hair whenever i go 'uke' or 'seme')

2. has matt beaten "rise of a ninja"?

3. if so, how long did it take him? (it took me 2 weeks. would have been  
sooner if there werent circle scratches on it)

4. i stole my best friends oversized chocolate...do you want it? its like a  
pound of chocolate

5. kakashi from naruto looks like an older version of near. should i shoot  
him? (pleez say no pleez say no pleez say no)

bye!

-chaos

**Chaos: **

**Oh, it's you again...**

**1. That kind of scares me. I had a disturbing mental image of Near in tight leather pants. *shudder* Punch him/her for me kays?**

**2. He hasn't, but said "he will in the next 12 hours, so ha!"**

**3. ...**

**4. Absolutely.**

**5. Yeeeehh-No. **

**Adios**

**-Mello out-**

i forgot some...

oh and hai beyond...

1. can i kidnap u and matt?

2. can i kidnap beyond?

3. can i kill near?

4. do you want my death note?

5. who's your fave naruto character? (mines K.H. ...you figure it out...)

6. one of my friends yelled at me when i told her my fave naruto  
character...not edward/near obsessor-although she doesnt like him eigther

bye!

-chaos *hears justin timberlake playing on a naruto ipod amv and jumps up then  
runs into wall*

**Oh for gods sake...**

**1. Ahh no! Whenever you idiots kidnap us, you throw us in a closet together and start screeching about yaoi! No!**

**2. I don't really care...**

**3. Please.**

**4. Aw hell ya'!**

**5. I don't watch Naruto... sorry. *eye roll***

**6. Um, sorry?**

**Haha sucker!**

**-Mello OUT-**

* * *

mello i love you,ur fucking sexy as hell and don't diss ur scar, it makes u  
look god damn gorjuz xx ar so fit so hot

ok fan girl moment over. here havesome chocolate.

1) how does it feel knowing u r going to die in 2 yrs (hey u survive 2012)

2) can i have 1 hug ?

3) why r u so fucking hot i mean shit ur drop dead gorgous.

4) would u consider the fact of being nears friend if urs and his rank maybe  
swapped?

and finally what are ur thoughts on black haired brown eyed girls + slightly  
tanned girls?

love u  
-madanimefreakgirl

**madanimefreakgirl: **

**Ok then! Thanks...?**

**Thanks!**

**1. I try to ignore that fact for the most part...**

**2. Just one. *hugs***

**3. *smirk* Comes naturally darlin'**

**4. Um...duh! **

**Um, okay I guess... I don't really care that much.**

**Bye!**

**-Mello out-**

oh sorryy i 4got 1 more question to my bad ass motherfucka love hehe *blush*  
how did it feel narrating death note another note the los angeles bb murder  
case? hahaha must of beaen awesome light imagay wasnt in it + what did u think  
of BB, he was pretty badass too. not as much as u obvs xxxx *goes off on a  
flying banana*

**You AGAIN? *shrug* Okay, whatever.**

**Um, it was cool I guess. And yes, no Light-bulb was the best part! I liked my one line:**

**TO HELL WITH KIRA**

**That was dramatic...**

**BB honestly creeps me the fuck out... I cannot! see why girls find him "hot" "sexy" or any other kind of atractive...He's a freaking serial killer! Is that what girls go for?**

**-Mello out AGAIN-**

ur taking 4 eva updating so i will ask more pointless questions. btw did u  
know u might and i repete MIGHT be making a new book

1. if for some reason you had to kill a 6yr old would you?

2. tigers or bears?

3. pheonix or harpie?

4. why did u leave england? it would of made my job as a stalk...errr 4get the  
last part

5. if near gave up ghe titleas no.1 just 4 u would u like him?

to sexy 4 ur shirt to sexy 4 ur shirt, hehe

7. kagamine rin or hatsune miku?

8. len kagamine or kaito?

luv u xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

***Sigh***

**Oh, I'M sorry. *eye roll***

**Really? Apparently I was uninformed of this fact...**

**1. Depends on why I had to. Just normally I wouldn't. Everything depends on your motivation.**

**2. Tigers.**

**3. Phoenix for sure.**

**4. O.o Because I needed the mafia connections.**

**5. Not particularly, he still would be a little emotionless freak! And besides, I wouldn't really have the title, just be pretending to have it.**

**6. You skipped 6...**

**7. kagamine rin**

**8. Kaito**

**-MELLO FUCKING OUT-**

* * *

Hello~!

Ahh. This is my first time doing this so I'm kind of shy...

1) What is your favorite Swiss chocolate?

2) If a shark and a salt water alligator fought, who would win? I actually  
watched a video on this where the show made a scenario about it..

3) If you could live in any city that you wanted to, where would you live?

I've ran out of things to ask... :( lame. Oh well!

Hasta luego!  
-insomniac

**insomniac: **

**Hello. **

**1. Lindt is the best.**

**2. Probably the alligator. But that would be a sick fight either way...**

**3. Brussels, Belgium. They have freaking amazing chocolate.  
**

**S'ok**

**-Mello out-**

* * *

Hey Mello, from one chill person to another, why the HELL are you answering  
these rapid fangirl questions? I pity you. Have some chocolate dude. *gives  
chocolate*

But since your here, I don't see any harm in asking.

1. You hate Near, for the obvious reason of him being a creepy albino... and  
for being number 1. Is there any other reason?

2. The mafia practically listens to every thing you say. How did you get so  
far up in the ranks so fast?

Like the you, the your leather, and your attitude.

~Pandora

**Pandora:**

**Because I have nothing better to do and... they give me free chocolate. Sue me.**

**Thanks.**

**You are also one of the few people to call me 'chill'. I honestly don't get that alot.**

**1. He pities me and looks down on me. I hate it.**

**2. Charisma I guess. **

**Cool. **

**-Mello out-**


	21. Chapter 21

**a/n Hey guys! Sorry that this took FOREVER to update. Been working on some other stories a lot but I'll try to update this again asap...**

* * *

Oh hiya Mello! I almost gave up on you- but I just can't. You're too damn sexy  
for your own good, you know that? That's the only reason Imagay Light-bulb  
killed you- he was jealous of your sexiness! (Tried, I mean)!

1. So, just for comformation- are you and Matt... Friends with benifits?  
Boyfriends? Partners?

2. ... To tell you the truth, I've only ever sat through the Death Note Live  
action movies (which apparently count as Horror Movies)... would you watch one  
with me (and Matt too!)

3. Sorry bout ANOTHER romancy-ish question (I know you hate them '-.-) but how  
did you and Matt first meet?

4. OMM (Oh my Mello lol!) I have a friend from Fiji! She's so cool! Did you  
know they still use the cane there?

5. Okay, this is a really stupid question and I feel so stupid for asking it,  
but does it please you that "M" comes before "N" and right after "L" in the  
alphabet? ^_^

6. Seriously, why DO you keep your gun there? Not that me (and most likely  
Matt) don't find it amazingly sexy, but isn't it damn dangerous?

7. I am currently in the middle of a war with a friend of mine who is  
completely NEARSESSED (ick) (about which of you is better, of course) and  
I'm afraid we're nearly at a fucking stalemate, so I was wondering if you  
could do/say something for me that is so fucking amazing she would have no  
choice but to give up (because every time I mention your sexiness and  
achievements, she has the perfect bloody retort for it!)

8. *blushing furiously* I- um... I was wondering... Uh, this is awkward cuz I  
know you won't like it... Can you ask Matt to give me a hug? Please? *holds  
out massive chocolate bar*

Okay, well, bye! *still blushing* Can I have a hug before I go please? *holds  
out keys to truck load of chocolate*

-No-name

**No-name:**

**Yes, and with good reason too... Have you seen that idiot's hair?**

**1. Um... very, very good friends... Partners I guess. :)**

**2. Why would you bother watching them? They sucked! I wasn't even in them! But if you insist...**

**3. At Wammy's when we were 7. We hit off right away I guess.**

**4. I did actually... though I fail to see the relevance of this particular question...**

**5. ABSOLUTELY! HA! (suck it, Near!)**

**6. Risks make life fun...**

**7. Chuck Norris + (Wammy's Boys -Near) = Totally awesome... Show this ninja math to your 'friend'**

**Actually this made very limited sense... ADHD acting up again...**

**8. Fine. One hug ONLY. Then he's mine again... *allows to hug Matt* **

**9. *Sigh* Yes *hugs***

**Thanks! *eats entire truckload of chocolate***

**~Mello Out~**

* * *

I'm bored what shall i do?

How are green house gases formed?

if 60÷x=J+K and J÷x=4 and x+5=8 what is the value of K?

Do u like waffles?

emo out, may life be honest and show u its true evil.

xXAnime4LifeXx

**xXAnime4LifeXx:**

**Probably ask me dumb questions by the sound of it...**

**Evaporation of water, plants and animals rotting, and humans primarily.  
**

**J = 12 (and yes I really did do the math...**

**Yes, very much so. Especially with Nutella on them.**

**Adios**

**~Mello Out~**

* * *

I wasn't talking about myself when I said fangirls, I meant the other  
reviewers, I'm not THAT stupid! XDDDDDDDDDDDD

-Matsuda

**Matsuda:**

**Coulda' fooled me...**

**~Mello OUT~**

* * *

Hey Mello,

You like screwing with Nears head right? I DARE you to go up to him say  
nothing and hug him... I'm betting he'd have an expression... Maybe even  
freak!(muahahaha)

Darkwish23

**Darkwish23:**

**I tried this and he did NOTHING! All he said was "Why is Mello touching me in this manner?" ! HE'S NOT EVEN HUMAN! **

**Good idea though, I like the way you think.**

**~Mello Out~**

* * *

Moth Mask ( .net/u/1699618/ )  
Reply URL: .net/review_?reviewid=124213848

;_; You don't make my Top Three Favorite Death Note Character List... But  
neither does Near, so you have that to be happy about :)

*Gives Mello an Aero (PLEASE tell me you know what this awesome chocolate bar  
is ;_;)*

Okay... Questions...

Do you know about the doujinshi game "D.n.D Poisoned"? If so, what are your  
thoughts on it?

Why must you hate Near so much? He can't help if his emotions are practically  
nonexistent ;_; Besides, he isn't better than you, really. Without you (and  
Matt, to some extent), Kira wouldn't have been caught D: He had no chance of  
doing it on his own. Besides, HE doesn't hate YOU. He took care making the  
Mello Finger Puppet, which implies that he liked you at least somewhat! :

Did you meet A? :D He bumped Near, Matt and you down on my favorites, even if  
he didn't get any backstory, character development, screentime, etc.

*gives Mello plushies of Matt, L, Near, Beyond, and Raito to use as he sees  
fit*

Don't be too mean to them? :)

I HAER JOO LIEK MUDKIPZ? :D

Mm, okay. That's all. Bye~~  
-Moth Mask

**Moth Mask:**

**Well... I guess that's okay then... *puts away shotgun***

**Yes, thanks!**

**Nope... Ask Matty. He probably does.**

**Oh, bite me. I just _don't like_ him. We NEVER 'clicked'. I don't like him and as much 'care' as he took with that damn puppet, he didn't like me either.**

**Yeah, he was an odd one. Didn't talk much. All the pressure just pushed him off a ledge he was already on in my opinion...**

***Hugs Matt* *Sets L on a shelf* *Spits on Near* *Smiles creeperishly at BB* *Lights Ratio on fire* ...hey. Fucker had it comin'  
**

**No promises there...**

**O.o**

**Bye!**

**~Mello Out~**

* * *

hi mello!

your my favourite character so have a semi-automatic pistol.

what are your thoughts on australian chocolate, i'll trade you some for a  
kiss.

what would you do if near found a way to clone himself?

ninja's or pirates?

what do you think of mxm fanfics where matt is seme?

your leather is sexy, why do you wear it?

do you have a budget limit on chocolate?

how did you become a mafia boss so quickly?

what would you do if someone kidnapped matt?

can i have an autographed photo of you?

-brattyteenagewerewolf

**brattyteenagewerewolf:**

**Thanks. Sweet, it's loaded!**

**Very good. Almost as good as German chocolate...hmmmmm, why not? *kisses***

**Kill the spare...**

**Pirates.**

**Grrrrrr... I am _so_ more dominant.**

**Intimidation mostly, it gives a tough first impression.**

**Nope. Whatever I have, I spend. Life's short, especially in the mafia, savings not really the top thing on any of our priority lists...**

**Intimidation, skill with a gun and leather. ;)**

**Kill 'em.**

**Maybe... *signs shirtless picture of self***

**Bye.**

**~Mello Out~**

* * *

i wouldnt do that...id lock joo downstairs-with the foosball table, tv, 2  
couches, a bench, cd player, ramen, my brother's 3ds, and chocolate. and jam,  
i might add.

bie

-chaos

**Chaos:**

**Well that sounds refreshing... And ramen actually sounds really good right now. Think I'll go grab some now cuz...**

**~Mello Is Out For A Long While~**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N.. yes it has been forever, lo siento, I just ask that you read the authors note at the bottom. Sorry, I did love this fic a lot.**

* * *

YAY! I NAO HAVE AN ACCOUNT! I IZ MIZORE NO KITSUNE! READ MY STORY MELLO! DEATH ON A MOTERCYCLE! YOU DONT DIE IN IT!

nao thats over, questions!

1. if you read my story, what do you think of it? should i post the prequal and sequal?

2. melloxmatt is like sasodei. thoughts on how you are so much like deidara and matt is so much like sasori?

3. want kakashi's make-out paradise?

's some ramen...

7. do you like the song 1985?

9. do you think the song wohuld be cool super-speedy and hi pitched?

20. can i have ur chocolate? im pmsing and my stomach hurts...

15. i got chocolate from my library for doing my summer reading...bet you wish you were me! and it was the good kind...i think it was called werthers origional...or something like that...and it had caramel in it too...

ja ne! (i got into the high school i wanted! yay! im going to japan before i graduate!)

-Chaos

**Chaos:**

**Good heavens! Maybe if you didn't go into FREAKING ALL-CAPS SCREAM LIKE A PHYCOPATH AJGOISGOHSDGJ MODE I would read your goddamn story...**

**1. I did read your story (thank god it was short) and liked it for the simple reason that THE FUCKING BITCH DIES! I liked it how it was... Maybe tell more about her life a Wammy's and how she was involved in their mission?**

**2. Um... yes? I have no idea what you are talking about.**

**3. I don't know who that is, but sure!**

**4. Danke, liebchen.**

**What the hell happened to 5 and 6?**

**7. Yeah, good song.**

**8?**

**9. For the love of god *shoots self at thought of chipmunk 1985***

**11-19... Learn to flipping count, onegai.**

**20. I wouldn't know what that feels like, but I'm sorry? Not really actually. *gives a single chocolate chip off of a cookie***

**Found 15!**

**15. I do... That's a good kind.**

** Omedetou!**

-Mello Out-

* * *

If Near looked like Matt and vice-versa, would you like Near then?

L

**Hey, L**

**No, I judge on personality and character.**

**And come visit Wammy's sometime...**

**-Mells**

* * *

back~

so...

1. do you know...?

2. if you had 3 wishes, what would they be? (no, you cant ask for more wishes)

3. what are your thoughts on chest afros?

4. who would be the most suitable actor to portray you in the DN american ver. live-action movie? (assuming they'll get to that arc))

5. if you and near were to switch places for a day (as in you in near's body and vice versa) how would that day go? (if you commit suicide, you cant return to youre original body and you can feel pain)

see you whenever

~L

**Hello again,**

**1. Shinigami love apples.**

**2. To beat Near, to kill Takada... grrr, and for Matt not to have died because of me.**

**3. -_-**

**4. Toby Hemingway, or... actually I don't know many American actors. They better get it right though.**

**5. Fail a test! (Inmature? Bite me.)**

**See yea,**

**~Mello**

* * *

MELLO! *goes to glomp and stops self* Uh, sorry... xD "No-Name" was me... Why didn't my account log in when I last reviewed? :O

1. Yes, the Death Note Live Action Movies sucked because you weren't in them D: I was deeply offended. Still, did you know that you totally kick ass because you got to write 2 books instead? HA!

2. About the Fiji question xD In the chapter before you said you would like to go to Fiji to which I responded with a random fact you didn't need to know xD (yeah, this aint a question)

3. You have ADHD?

4. *hugs Matt because you let me* Yay! Thankyou! He's so warm, do you know how fuckin lucky you are to have him? (had to turn that into a question somehow xD)

5. Did you know your ninja math is extremely epic?

Ok... I know you don't like hugs, so I won't ask again... *frowns* but give Matt one for me, ok? Thanks~!

-skylarkz

**skylarkz:**

**It's all right.**

**1. Touche**

**2. They never are... *sighs* They never are...**

**3. Mildly. Most geniuses do. Speeds up thought processing and creativity of thinking.**

**4. Yes, I am.**

**5. I can imagine**

**I think you already did? (There, that is an example of a question.)**

**Bye,**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

wow! U actually did it! That question was like grade B GCSE!

Anyway do u like hula dancing?

what about belly dancing?

oh and pole dancing?

Whos better L or Matt?

-xXAnime4LifeXx

**xXAnime4LifeXx:**

**Easy as hell.**

**No.**

**Watching it.**

***smirk* Actually have a bit of talent in that area.**

**L is a better detective but Matt is a better friend.**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

Hehe... So you're from France, eh ? Let's check it...

1. Que penses-tu des licornes ? *smirks sadistically*

2. As-tu déjà pensé à utiliser une arme autre qu'un pistolet ou une bombe ?

3. Pourquoi penses-tu que tout le monde te demande ton avis sur les licornes ?

4. Est-ce frustrant ?

vampires qui brillent n'existent pas ! Que penses-tu d'eux ? (Je déteste Twilight)

6. Une menace que tu utilises souvent.

7. L ou Artemis Fowl ?

To help you, all those questions have already been asked (except the last one). Enjoy it ! *Smirks thinking of poor LeahKeehl13*

PS : Btw, the "my IQ is 161" doesn't fit. Mine is (you're not allowed to say "it explains lots of things") and I don't exactly feel a genius (well, I actually do :D, but not like you) so I'll suppose you've made a typo ;-).

PPS : you've gotta say "a gogol" and not "a google". And it's only 10^100 (whereas gogolplex is 10^gogol). Anyway, that's a typo too ;-)

PPPS : of course you've not to copy this entire review in your chapter... But it will appear in any case :D

Oh, and I like your way of writing. I also like torturing people.

-Arrakis

**Arrakis:**

**Yup.**

**1. Vous aussi?**

**2. Comme un fusil à harpon?**

**3. Parce qu'ils sont stupides et sans originalité**

**4. oui, très**

**5. Ils étaient bons, avant Edward**

**6. Je vais vous déchirer membre par membre et de jeter les morceaux dans de l'acide bouillant. :D**

**7. L évidence**

**Ils ont tous été incroyablement facile.**

**O.O 261... mon erreur**

**^^ nouveau**

**Oui, oui, il sera**

**Au revoir, mon ami français**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

Ｈｉ， Ｍｅｌｌｏ

Ｉｌｏｖｅ ｙｏｕｒ ｎａｍｅ～～Ｉｔ ｓｏｕｎｄｓ ｓｏ ｄｅｌｉｃｉｏｕｓ． Ｉｔ ｒｅｍｉｎｄｓ ｍｅ ｍｏｓｔｌｙ ｏｆ ｍａｒｓｈｍａｌｏｗｓ ａｎｄ ｊｅｌｌｏ． Ｑｕｅｓｔｉｏｎｓ～！

１ Ｏｐｉｎｉｏｎ ｏｎ ｔｈｅ ｉｎｔｅｒｎｅｔ？

２ Ｈｏｗ ｍａｎｙ ｃａｖｉｔｉｅｓ ｄｏ ｙｏｕ ｈａｖｅ？（ｉ'ｍ ｓｕｒｅ ｙｏｕ ｍｕｓｔ ｈａｖｅ ｓｏｍｅ ｘＤ）

３ Ｔｈｅ ｍｏｓｔ ｈｅａｒｔｗｒｅｎｃｈｉｎｇ ｔｈｉｎｇ ｙｏｕ'ｖｅ ｅｖｅｒ ｓｅｅｎ？ （ｕｎｌｅｓｓ ｙｏｕ ｈａｖｅ ｎｏ ｈｅａｒｔ．．．）

４ Ｐｌａｙ ａｎｙ ｉｎｓｔｒｕｍｅｎｔｓ？

５ Ｗｈａｔ ｉｆ Ｎｅａｒ ｓｈｏｗｅｄ ｕｐ ｏｎ ｙｏｕｒ ｄｏｏｒｓｔｅｐ， ｂｒｏｋｅｎ ｄｏｗｎ ｉｎ ｔｅａｒｓ？ （ｓａｙ， ａ ｌｏｔ ｏｆ ｔｅｒｒｉｂｌｅ ｔｈｉｎｇｓ ｈａｐｐｅｎｅｄ ｔｏ ｈｉｍ ａｎｄ ｈｅ ｄｏｅｓｎ'ｔ ｈａｖｅ ａ home or friends?)

6 How did you get seperated from your parents, and if you ever spent some time with them, how were they?

7 And, most interesting question, to me: What if near and Matt switched bodies by accident and its permanent?

8 Ever wanted to go to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory? Mmmm, a chocolate river... I have a golden ticket if you want =3

orzzz sorry for so much questions..

I used to hate Near with a passion and loooved you the most, but my evil brother hated you and loved near. But it switched, he likes you and hates near, but i like you both (don't hate me plz ) But shoot my brother, please. He worshipped near, and spat at you. I'll give you my golden ticket if you do so~

Thank you~! ^w^

~heartnote

**Heartnote:**

**Um.. Thanks. :)**

**1. Our greatest invention ever but also the greatest cripling factor of society today.**

**2. Only one. I brush twice a day.**

**3. A... After he hung himself... He was such a great guy. -.-**

**4. Tried guitar... Got bored.**

**5. He can sleep on the doorstep. I at least have a little compassion!**

**6. They died when I was very young.**

**7. Not much, I don't hate Near because of how he looks. That would be incredibly shallow of me.**

**8. That would be amazing. Give!**

**Click-Clack bam! Give!**

**Danke, Liebchen**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

Heyyyyyy, MelloMello! (that is your new nickname, so SUCK IT!)

Ok, ok, QUESTION TIME! SIT AROUND CHILDREEEEEN! *random kids file in next to you*

Kids: Story time!

Me: No, question time! You know what? Just get out! Shoo! *shoves children out of room*

OK! MelloMello!

1) If you could be any animal, what would you be? And you can't be an insomniac panda OR a shark with a grenade launcher.

2) If you had to babysit a preschool full of 5 year old kids, how many would die?

3) Do you have ADHD, MelloMello? Cos I do, and I is PRO at pising people off because of it! LIFE SKILLS!

4) You know that gigantuariey ropey scar face thingamo on your face, what are your thoughts about that? *puts hand on chin psychiatrist style*

AAAAAAAAND 5) What is your middle name? You tell me yours and I'll tell you mine? Of fine then, my middle name is Jane, ya happy? Ok, what is your middle name? *throws bag of M&Ms at head*

Also, sorry about throwing chocolate at your head. I have a lot left over from Easter... *throws 50 meter high chocolate bunny at head ON THE SCAR SIDE*

^^'

Don't kill me.

Frogata =3

**Frogata:**

***scowl* Hey freakfreak... Go suck on yourself!**

**1. A tiger... What? Tigers fucking rock!**

**2. 1 or 2 at most... I'm not THAT terrible!**

**3. High Five! And yes, mildy... as already explained, most geniuses do.**

**4. I hate it. Admittedly it does look pretty BA though...**

**5. Chenkov**

**AAUGH! *ducks***

**BAKA!**

**-Mello Out!-**

* * *

your at a local candy shop eating ,well cocoletete... and you as ordanary finish it even though it has a pecular taste... you having already paid are about to leave when a deranged laugh comes from in the backroom. you haveing ur brains reco ised this laugh. It was Light! or should u say Kira`... but how kira died that day! being u, You used your bwains and pulled out your Gun when all of a sudden you start throwing up zombie Near fairys lots and lots of them. when u stop all of the faires smile in there cute little pink dresses and lift u off the ground and into the clouds and for some reason the idoits around u didnt even try to help u but just drooled on themselves like usaul.

when u were a good 200 ft in the air they said that they were going to drop u. then desending from the clouds a pegasus came and said to get on it. it then told u that u were the chosen one and had to slay the kira dragon

what wouldyou do :D

-ginger123113

**Ginger123113:**

**Slay the damn dragon! And take my gun and shoot the Near fairys...**

**O.o Incidently, it must be a dark and scary place inside your imagination...**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

Firstly, what the hell? Is it some kind of rule that all blonde chocolate-lovers that wear a lot of black are cursed with always being second to a sheep-in-human-form? The 'Near' person I know is frickin' dyslexic and yet I still lose to her at scrabble... Grrrrrr! And all she ever does is sit there and blink at you! HOW THE HELL DID YOU MANAGE TO NOT KILL THE KID!

Random question, not at all related; your opinion on Lolita?

And lastly, how is it possible for you to be so epic without the Death Note world imploding? :)

I love you Mello-kun! You're the personification of epicness!

Lolita Mello-chan

**Lolita Mello-chan: (Um.. no coment on the name..)**

**Very difficult, honey. I'm sure you can simpathize...**

**For GIRLS!**

**Cause we have morons like Mikani to counteract my sheer amazingness.**

**Arigato!**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

:D Thank you for not shooting me in the head!

:( Hrm. Fine, then. But I still think you and Near could've at least been friends, had you met in a less competitive environment...

:O Awesome, you met A~ What about B? You wrote that book on him, remember? You must've met him, too, right?

Ah, it isn't really Raito's fault, though. He was screwed over the moment he got the Death Note. It screwed with his head.

Ask Matt two questions for me, okay?

1. Have you heard of Poisoned, and if so, what do you think of it (especially the "Loyal Dog", "The Puzzle", and "Forever" endings)?

2. DO U LIEK MUDKIPZ?

Thanks ^_^

-Moth Mask

**Moth Mask: **

**-_- You're welcome...**

**Maybe. (I'm STILL not agreeing.)**

**I was still young when he left Wammy's, but yes, I met him.**

**That bastard was screwed up in the head long before he picked up that cursed book.**

**1. He hadn't?**

**2. He cracked up... Not quite sure...**

**Bye**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

I'm tired so this shall be short.

Shoot near. He stole my biscuits.

Have chocolate. *gives three truck loads*

night- *collapses on key board*

Jake: ... J K L M!

Belarus: so what we doing? Infiltrating Joys laptop?

Jake: STOP WITH THE HACKING ALREADY!

Belarus: no. I'm clicking send

Jake: WAIT NO NO N

joy2theworlddannyphantom

joy2theworlddannyphantom:

**Thats unusual.**

***shoots near, misses, chases screaming 'get back her you damn biscuit theif', catches him, shoots through head, near dead, yay***

**danke, liebchen.  
**

**um... night.**

**You guys creep me out... leave. now.**

**-Mello Out-**

* * *

**A note from Mello:**

**Well guys I wanted to let you know that I will be officially ending 'Ask Mello' because unfortunately the author is developing an incredibly busy life OUTSIDE of fanfiction **(a/n :'( )** and hates leaving everyone waiting for months at a time. No more questions but if you ask for it I will personally say goodbye to you.  
**

**It's been fun/scary/disturbing/frustrating talking to you crazy people and learning to see the world through the eyes of a 'fangurl' (NEVER AGAIN).**

**I must say though, thanks for the truckloads of chocolate, undying patience for month long waits, and of course for bringing Mattie and I back to life. (;**

**I might miss you. *crosses fingers*  
**

**Adios**

**Goodbye**

**Sayonara**

**Au Revoir**

**-Mello Forever Out-**


	23. Chapter 23

This book is the property of the half-blood prince...

Oops! Wrong fandom!

This story is now the property of **Mizore no Kitsune**. They will be adopting it for moi.

Thanks you guys! It's been a blast!

~LeahKeehl13

* * *

P.S. I'm not doing the goodbyes as I guess it is continuing.


	24. Chapter 24

Hi people!

I'm still not doing this story but _**Mizore no Kitsune**_ is. It's on her profile under the same name. (_**Ask Mello XD**_). Her version is quite funny. So, go check it out!

-LeahKeehl13


End file.
